DSMC Chapter 78

Yan Jiyun completed the side mission and reverted to human form.

After finishing the task, the system did not broadcast his progress on the public screen. It seemed that Easy instances were far more rigorous than the Newcomer ones, allowing him to stay hidden more effectively.

Yan Jiyun glanced at the Bengal white tiger player. The other party clearly had no idea that, in the blink of an eye, another player in the same zone had already completed a side mission.

Not knowing was better. It saved him the trouble of covering things up. Not exposing his true form was the best outcome. It meant he could continue moving around the zoo and act according to circumstances.

He took the initiative to stroke Jinzhu, Yinzhu, and Yuzhu, then walked beneath the rockery and said to Orange, “Thank you, Orange.”

Orange was extremely perceptive. It had been the fastest among the tigers to break free from Uncle Man’s white powder and had even deliberately run far away to draw Uncle Man’s attention, giving Yan Jiyun the chance to make contact with the other tigers.

Orange lowered its head and rubbed against Yan Jiyun’s hair.

Yan Jiyun happily rubbed the tiger’s huge head. He felt that he could probably swagger around the tiger zone now. Orange looked like the most formidable one here; the other tigers didn’t dare act rashly in front of it.

The visitors outside were already howling with excitement.

“Human–tiger interaction is so touching.”

“He’s the new zookeeper, right? I’ve never seen him here before when I visited the Tiger Zone.”

“That zookeeper is amazing. He treats the tigers so well. Just look at how gentle his gaze is.”

“That’s definitely the contrast effect. The tigers hardly get close to the other zookeepers, but with this one, they cooperate with whatever he does.”

Yan Jiyun listened to the visitors singing his praises, then glanced at the popularity leaderboard. Another hour had passed, and there had been changes again.

His ranking had climbed forward once more!

Wasn’t he supposed to keep a low profile? Why did he keep rising again? Still, he wasn’t too conspicuous, he’s only hovering around 10th place.

Uncle Man had his head cracked open by a stick, and medical staff quickly brought in a stretcher to carry him away.

Yan Jiyun took the opportunity to leave the tiger zone along with the medical staff.

There were countless visitors coming and going in the zoo, and all sorts of sudden incidents happened every day, so there was an infirmary on site. He had checked the map; it was located together with the animal medical bay¹.

By accompanying Uncle Man to the infirmary, he could conveniently check out other work environments along the way. Maybe he could even uncover some new clues.

For the first time, he realized just how hard it was to find the main mission.

Not long after Uncle Man entered the infirmary, an ambulance arrived and took him away. Yan Jiyun guessed that this NPC probably wouldn’t appear again.

Yan Jiyun picked up the walkie-talkie Uncle Man had left behind in the infirmary. Just as he was about to study whether it had any use, a voice suddenly came through.

The caller used the fake identity he had applied with when calling him: “Is Jiang You there?”

Yan Jiyun stood outside the animal medical bay and answered into the walkie-talkie, “Here.” The system really hadn’t been kind.

The other side said, “Please come to the medical bay immediately. We need your assistance.”

Yan Jiyun thought that the system must be monitoring him. He had just arrived here and already received a task.

“Okay. I just brought Uncle Man over. I’ll right there.”

“Alright. We’re short-handed right now. Go find Dr. Peng. He needs your help. Please hurry.”

“On my way.”

After the call ended, no matter how Yan Jiyun tried to reach them, there was no response. It seemed that this walkie-talkie was a task-dispatch device, and the NPC speaking to him was only there to issue missions.

Yan Jiyun found the medical bay. It was divided into several rooms, each with the doctor’s name posted outside, along with a line stating the species they specialized in and their area of expertise.

He was extremely resistant to veterinarians. His human had often taken him to pet hospitals; after seeing doctors so many times, he really didn’t want to deal with them at all.

The first two rooms were silent and didn’t belong to Dr. Peng, so he skipped them and went straight to the third room.

Then he heard a voice cursing nonstop.

“Bad guy, bad guy, stealing my stuff!”

“You have no shame, absolutely shameless!”

“Get out, get out, you idiot!”

“Hubby, my leg hurts~ can you carry me~~”

“Quack doctor, quack doctor!”

Yan Jiyun: “…”

He knocked on the open door. Inside, a man in a white lab coat stood with his hands in his pockets, looking rather helplessly at a hyacinth macaw² perched on a rack.

Don’t ask how Yan Jiyun knew the bird’s exact species.

In the real world, as a freely roaming cat living in a residential complex with thousands of households, he encountered all kinds of pets.

His human was away most of the time. Though they had known each other for a year, they probably spent only half a year together, or even less. Most of the time, he played outside on his own and met many little companions. Among them was a macaw.

That macaw belonged to a young man who worked a 9-to-5 job and was called “Baby³.” It loved sneaking outside. Once, it slipped free from the chain on its leg and flew off, then didn’t know how to get home. After getting tired, it perched in a tree to rest.

During that period, Yan Jiyun liked listening to a grandma who had moved from Suzhou play the pipa and sing. He would habitually lie in a tree listening to her perform.

One day, a macaw stood in his usual spot. This macaw had a terrible mouth and was extremely noisy. Yan Jiyun thought that, since he was free anyway, he might as well start a fierce battle with the foul-mouthed macaw that was ruining grandma’s playing. He beat it until it no longer dared to curse.

That hyacinth macaw was a pure trash-talker. After their fight, Baby and Caramel became famous in their residential complex for their fight.

At first, the young man thought his macaw would never be found again. Later, he saw a video of their fight in the group chat — his macaw being pinned to the ground and rubbed by a cat. After retrieving his bird, the young man even wanted compensation from Yan Jiyun’s human. Unfortunately, he failed. The Suzhou grandma said that the parrot’s language was so foul that even a cat couldn’t stand it and had only tried to cover its beak. Besides, Caramel hadn’t injured the parrot at all. There’s not a single feather missing.

The young man thought about it and realized that made sense.

The other elderly folks also persuaded him: the macaw had been the one to insult the cat first. Being able to get the macaw back was already a blessing, and the cat’s owner hadn’t even made a fuss. Under their persuasion, the young man finally bought Yan Jiyun a pile of canned food. After that, he brought Baby to the community’s senior activity center every day to feed the cats. From then on, Yan Jiyun and Baby formed an unbreakable bond — whenever Baby learned to curse while imitating its owner gaming, Yan Jiyun would smack it with a paw.

Later, Baby’s owner felt ashamed. He didn’t even dare curse while gaming at home anymore. Because he often went to the senior activity center to feed cats, he met a young woman who lived in the complex. The two of them seemed to be close to getting married.

Seeing this macaw made Yan Jiyun’s memories come rushing back. He was actually quite grateful for the contributions made by classmate Baby; otherwise, he would be completely dumbfounded here today, unable to even recognize a parrot’s species.

That young Dr. Peng said, “Xiao Jiang, you came at the perfect time. It’s been cursing at me nonstop. See if you have any way to make it stop for now.”

Yan Jiyun didn’t know why it was here. “Huh? Is it sick?”

Dr. Peng gave a bitter smile. “It talks too much and it’s very smart. It doesn’t want to be examined and keeps smacking me with its wings. I can’t handle it alone. I need you to give me a hand.”

Yan Jiyun thought about the things it had just been saying; they were probably all learned from visitors. “It really is a bit too smart.”

Dr. Peng asked him, “I heard from your supervisor that you’re pretty good at training birds, especially parrots⁴.”

Yan Jiyun: “……”

He recalled Jiang You’s résumé. There really did seem to be such a line.

What a trap of a system. He had just become a zookeeper in the game less than an hour ago and was already treated like a veteran employee.

Besides, when had he ever trained parrots? He only beat up macaws, okay?

And who exactly was his supervisor?

Too many questions spun out at once; Yan Jiyun didn’t even know where to start complaining.

“But aren’t we not allowed to train animals?” Yan Jiyun found an excuse to shirk it.

“Of course not the kind of training for animal performances. I’m against animal performances too. Just see if you can get it to stop hitting people so we can do the examination first.”

Yan Jiyun said, “Okay.”

He stood in front of the parrot and asked it, “What’s your name?”

The macaw had clearly been trained. It replied, “Xixi. Xi as in cherish⁵.”

Yan Jiyun said, “If you have siblings, they should be called Zhenzhen and Ai’ai⁶.”

Dr. Peng laughed. “Don’t say that. It really does have siblings called Zhenzhen and Ai’ai. They’ll be coming over for checkups soon. A while ago, the macaws ate something unknown and got sick as a group. Right now, the number that can be put on display is really too small, which is affecting the normal operation of the parrot zone.”

Yan Jiyun suddenly received a new piece of information; the clouds in his heart parted to sunshine. “How do you need me to help?”

Dr. Peng said, “Xixi never cooperates well during physical exams. You hold it, and I’ll check its feathers.”

Yan Jiyun had beaten a macaw before, but he’d never held one. How was he supposed to hold it?

Xixi had a full coat of beautiful feathers: golden yellow in front, and an extremely beautiful glazed blue on its back. The feathers were smooth and bright, making people want to touch them at first glance.

Dr. Peng issued him a task, but Yan Jiyun didn’t receive any system task notification. This process was likely a necessary step for something. He would just patiently do it first.

Yan Jiyun sized up the macaw , which had stopped cursing ever since he came in. Could it be that it treated people differently based on who they were?

It cursed nonstop in front of the veterinarian, but behaved obediently in front of the zookeeper, answering whenever asked.

Yan Jiyun guessed. Was it possible that Xixi was actually a player?

But it didn’t seem like it. It was so arrogant in front of the veterinarian and became very well-behaved in front of the zookeeper, which clearly suggested it might hold different feelings toward zookeepers.

If a player wanted to win over visitors to earn popularity points, saying a few auspicious phrases would be enough. There was no need to curse people and then get taken to the animal infirmary for an exam.

Seeing that Yan Jiyun hadn’t picked Xixi up, Dr. Peng urged him, “Xiao Jiang, hurry and hold it. It’s pretty smart, but it’s especially resistant when it sees doctors. We also can’t have too much contact with them, or they’ll get angry.”

Yan Jiyun thought to himself that he also got angry when he saw veterinarians. They were either shaving fur or drawing blood. Animals would be strange if they had a good attitude toward vets.

Xixi seemed to understand their conversation and shouted at Yan Jiyun, who was coming to grab it, “Murder! Murder!”

It was an adult macaw, with a body length of around 80 cm. It was quite a big one.

Yan Jiyun recalled how that young man had held Baby back then, and forcibly picked up the squawking Xixi.

When Xixi saw Yan Jiyun approach, it flapped its wings and screamed, “Go away, go away, go away!”

Yan Jiyun thought disdainfully that macaws really were all quite noisy.

When Xixi was suddenly grabbed by Yan Jiyun, it stopped yapping and instead stared at Yan Jiyun with its pea-sized eyes, the man and the bird staging a big-eyes-versus-small-eyes showdown.

Dr. Peng took the opportunity to start checking its beak, feathers, claws, and other parts.

Dr. Peng said, “We need it to spread its wings to check its heartbeat.”

Yan Jiyun said, “Come on, Xixi, spread your wings.”

Xixi seemed to have a natural sense of fear toward Yan Jiyun and obediently spread its wings.

After spreading its wings, it suddenly shouted, “Cat, hateful! Cat, too hateful!”

Yan Jiyun’s hands supporting Xixi paused slightly. “……”

[Want to be Human] livestream channel:

“Holy shit, Xixi exposed Kitty Baby true form! What’s going on? In the previous instances, NPCs couldn’t see it!”

“It’s the chatterbox Xixi! Can it see the kitten’s true form? Look, the kitten changed expression for the first time!”

“Let me spoil it for everyone: Xixi will die in the end!”

“No, why does Xixi know Mimi’s true form? Did the system bug out?”

“Wait, who just said Xixi will die in the end? How does it die?”

“Such a cute Xixi will die in the end? Can you be human? It just appeared and it’s going to die.”

“I don’t think it’ll die.”

Yan Jiyun froze for a moment. Could this macaw see through his true form, or was it just shouting randomly?

Yan Jiyun glared at Xixi and thought wickedly: Call again and I’ll sew your mouth shut.

With Yan Jiyun diverting Xixi’s attention, Dr. Peng smoothly placed the heartbeat-checking instrument under its feathers.

As he recorded the results, Dr. Peng said, “The heartbeat is very healthy. Alright. Next, we need to draw some blood.”

Yan Jiyun knew that parrots’ blood is drawn from the neck, and that they usually resisted strongly. He remembered that when Baby’s owner was pursuing a girl from the same residential complex, he told some amusing stories about taking Baby to the pet hospital to attract her attention, including how doctors drew blood from parrots.

Dr. Peng brought over a blue bag. “Here, put it inside, it’s an anti-scratch bag.” This bag was to prevent the parrot from being startled and spreading its wings to hit people, as its claws were also very sharp and could draw blood at any time. Drawing blood was a dangerous procedure. There could be no random movement.

Yan Jiyun pressed a hand on Xixi’s back, but still asked for its opinion. “Do you want to use the bag?”

Xixi looked at his hand as if it were seeing a cat’s paw and cried out in terror, “The bag. Don’t want the bag!”

Yan Jiyun seemed to have found what Xixi was afraid of. It was afraid of his hand. Xixi really might be able to see his true form.

Then, following this line of thought, could it be that parrots were all able to see his true form?

Just in case, Yan Jiyun still put the blue anti-scratch bag Dr. Peng handed him over Xixi, slipping it on.

“It still needs to be put on. Xixi, don’t move.”

Xixi just stared at Yan Jiyun, scrutinizing him. It didn’t even notice when Dr. Peng’s curved needle pierced its neck to draw blood.

After finishing the blood draw, Dr. Peng praised Yan Jiyun. “Zookeepers really are different from us doctors. Even the hardest-to-handle parrot was taken care of. We doctors only ever get disliked by them and become thorns in their eyes. Especially elephants and apes. Sigh… really, they hold grudges the moment they see us.”

Yan Jiyun echoed, “Because every time they see a doctor, they get blood drawn, fur shaved, and pain along with it. Even people don’t like seeing doctors, let alone animals of different species.”

Dr. Peng said, “Yes, that’s exactly it.”

After Xixi’s physical exam ended, Dr. Peng untied the anti-scratch bag. Xixi stood on the bar where the examination tools were placed and shouted at Yan Jiyun, “Cat! Cat! Cat!”

Yan Jiyun: “……”

Alright, I know you know I’m a cat.

Dr. Peng only took it as Xixi being talkative and didn’t pay attention to what it was shouting.

Yan Jiyun likewise pretended he knew nothing and said to Dr. Peng, “Dr. Peng, if there’s nothing else, I’ll be going.”

Dr. Peng said, “That’s all. Could you help me send Xixi back while you’re at it?”

Yan Jiyun readily agreed. “Sure.”

Dr. Peng said politely, “Sorry to trouble you.”

Yan Jiyun raised his arm toward Xixi and stared at the parrot that wanted to dodge him. “Xixi, let’s go.”

After roughly weighing the terror value between the veterinarian and the cat, it ultimately chose to go with the cat.

Xixi didn’t jump onto Yan Jiyun’s arm, but instead flew onto his shoulder and stood there. It made it look more imposing.

Before leaving, Yan Jiyun asked Dr. Peng, “Doctor, do you know when the white tiger arrived at the zoo?”

Although Dr. Peng wasn’t liked by the animals and couldn’t be friends with them, he loved them. He said, “I don’t really remember. It’s not one I’m responsible for examining.”

Yan Jiyun asked again, “What about Jinzhu and the others?”

Dr. Peng replied immediately, “These three tigers, I watched them being born. They were born right here in our zoo, last May. What’s up?”

Yan Jiyun said, “Nothing, I just wanted to understand their ages. I just arrived and don’t know them very well yet.”

Dr. Peng said, “Sure. If you want to ask anything, you can come to me.”

Yan Jiyun hadn’t expected an NPC to be so easy to talk to. “Sure, I’ll come by when I have time.”

A zookeeper brought a small animal over for an examination, and Yan Jiyun took Xixi and left.

So far, the main mission still hasn’t been triggered. What exactly was the main mission of this instance?

He had just gone through a round of life-and-death danger, and that was only a side mission. He had to admit that the difficulty of the Easy-level instance was indeed higher than what he had encountered before.

It was quite a long walk from the infirmary. Yan Jiyun turned on the walkie-talkie and tried asking, “May I ask where my electric scooter is?”

Every zookeeper was equipped with an electric scooter; it was impossible that he didn’t have one.

As expected, a response came through the walkie-talkie, giving him the location where his scooter was parked. Thankfully, it’s not far from the medical bay entrance.

To send Xixi back, he needed to head to the Aviary Grand View area, which was the various bird exhibition zones.

The zoo had many rare birds, but there weren’t many animals that could chatter away in human speech.

After following Yan Jiyun out, Xixi suddenly became even more energetic, chattering nonstop and wanting to spread its wings and fly high. Yan Jiyun grabbed its foot in one swift motion.

He warned Xixi, “If you dare fly away, I’ll scratch all your feathers off.”

Xixi said, “Bad cat, bad cat, a cat is about to pounce on a bird!”

Seeing it stand obediently, Yan Jiyun only gave it a look of disdain. “Behave yourself, or I’ll put a leg chain on you.”

Xixi cried, “Don’t want a leg chain!”

“Wow, such a handsome Xiao Gege! Can we take a photo together!”

“Little girl, you’re so cute. Uncle has candy here, do you want some?”

“Little boy, why are you here alone? Gege will take you to find your mom.”

The more Yan Jiyun listened, the more wrong it sounded. “What little boy and little girl? Where did you hear that?”

He was sure Xixi wasn’t a player. It might also be a small NPC that issued missions, and one that frequently wandered off its post at that. Otherwise, where would it have heard so many strange conversations?

Xixi only knew to pour out everything it had learned to Yan Jiyun, but where to find people who trafficked children like that, it really had no idea.

Yan Jiyun found a sapphire-blue real electric scooter at the entrance. It wasn’t the kind of sightseeing cart tourists rode; this one could only seat a single adult. It was a real electric scooter.

There was a key in it. Yan Jiyun got on and rode straight toward the Aviary Grand View.

Xixi thought his scooter was too slow and took off flying, but only flew a bit higher than Yan Jiyun, not too far.

When it flew back, it landed directly on Yan Jiyun’s shoulder. It thought it was fun. After flying out and coming back, it even wanted to step on the cat’s head. As a result, Yan Jiyun grabbed its claws in one motion and directly fastened the small chain Dr. Peng had given him onto Xixi’s leg, buckling it to the scooter’s basket.

Having lost its freedom, Xixi began cursing nonstop. “Bad cat! Bad cat! Bad cat!”

The bad cat Yan Jiyun turned a deaf ear to Xixi’s shrill protests. How could cats and birds ever coexist peacefully? Truly thinking too much!

He rode the little electric scooter, puttering along toward the aviary area. Not having to walk or run was happiness.

He wasn’t familiar with the zoo’s roads and chose the main path directly. A zookeeper riding an electric scooter with a parrot in tow was extremely eye-catching. Many visitors were drawn to the macaw and took out their phones to shoot videos.

Humans and animals living in harmony. That was love and peace.

Yan Jiyun marveled at how well the scooter ran. The battery display still looked quite ample, and it seemed he was about to reach the Aviary Grand View.

Great. He could finally stuff this talkative parrot back into its exhibit.

Although there was no navigation, there were road signs everywhere in the zoo, all clearly marking how many meters remained to each destination. It was a very considerate design.

The latest sign indicated there was still one kilometer to go.

The area he was currently in still had quite a lot of foot traffic.

By the lake, there was a broadcast telling visitors not to feed the fish; if too many people fed them, the goldfish could stuff themselves to death.

This zoo was no different from the real world at all — the same kind of visitors, the same kind of broadcast reminders, the same kind of silly fish.

Real-world parrots couldn’t see through his true form; this was the biggest difference from the real world.

As long as he crossed this lake, he would reach his destination. Otherwise, with a macaw constantly exposing his identity, he would sooner or later be discovered by players with ulterior motives.

However, right here, the electric scooter suddenly slowed down on its own, and then it stopped!

Yan Jiyun tried to start it again, but the scooter wouldn’t move at all. The display clearly showed 80% battery remaining. After he pulled out the key, he found that the battery needle still pointed to 80%.

Great. This display screen was completely broken. The scooter had basically no charge at all.

He’d said it before: there was no way the system would be so kind to players!

It wasn’t that far anymore; he would just walk the rest of the way.

He parked the scooter by the roadside where it wouldn’t affect others, then unfastened Xixi’s little chain and let it move freely for a bit.

As it turned out, he gave it freedom, but it couldn’t be bothered to fly.

Yan Jiyun led it across the road, wanting to take a shortcut to the aviary area. Then a man bumped into his shoulder and almost hit Xixi as well.

How could Xixi miss such a perfect chance to yap? “Someone got hit! Someone got killed! Someone got hit! Someone got killed!”

The man wore a hat and sunglasses. The little girl he was holding was slumped in his arms and seemed to be asleep. What was strange was that everyone else was heading toward the aviary, while he was going in the opposite direction. And children at the zoo should be excited. It was still morning. How could she possibly be asleep?

Just as Yan Jiyun was about to cover Xixi’s mouth, the system suddenly prompted him.

[Player has triggered side mission: “The Despicable Human Trafficker.”]

Yan Jiyun realized that his first reaction wasn’t that someone was kidnapping a child, but rather: why had the system suddenly become so positive and righteous?

T/N:

Parrots, taxonomically speaking, is an Ordo (Psittaciformes). There’s approximately 410 species and 101 genera in this Ordo. Besides macaws, cockatoo, parakeets, and kākā (New Zealand parrots) are members of this Ordo. Macaws are New World Parrot (Psittacidae — one of the four Families in this Ordo) found natively in Central and South America, and are known for their colorful plumage, strong beaks, and long tails. They are also a common pet/companion birds.

Left to right: Scarlet macaw (Ara macao), Blue and yellow macaw (Ara ararauna) and Military macaw (Ara militaris)

1
to differentiate it easier, I’ll use “infirmary/hospital” for humans, and “medical bay/facility” for animals
2
one of the biggest macaws, can reach 1 m (head to tails) and weigh 1.7 kg. Picture:
3
CN: 宝宝 bǎobǎo
4
FYI: macaws are a type of parrot. More info on footnote~
5
CN: 惜惜
6
珍珍 = treasure; 爱爱 = love