CM Chapter 46

Chapter 46 – Empty Feelings

Chapter 2, Part 10.2

Novel Title: ひとりじめ (Completely Mine)

Author：椎崎 夕 (Shiizaki You)

Illustrator：小山田 あみ (Oyamada Ami)

Translator: K (@kin0monogatari)

Protagonists: 細川 湊 (Hosokawa Minato -MC) & 荻原 浩志 (Ogiwara Koushi -ML)

*Please read at knoxt.space, the original site of translation. TQ*

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“Don’t decide things on your own. Who asked you to do any of this?”

With a forceful movement, Ogiwara stood up as if kicking the chair away. Minato could tell that others were starting to look, but this time, he had no intention of backing down, no matter what.

Silently, Minato met Ogiwara’s gaze, and though Ogiwara had been furious, he seemed to swallow his words. He pressed his lips together, still looking at Minato with an expression that clearly showed his dissatisfaction.

Minato had no intention of speaking any further. Seeing that Ogiwara had calmed down, he slowly stood up from his seat.

“That’s all I have to say. Sorry, but I have to go or I’ll be late for work. Let’s part ways here.”

“Sensei!”

Ignoring the call, Minato paid for both of their bills and left the café. As he walked toward the nearby station, he felt a tug on his elbow from behind.

“Wait! Let’s talk.”

“I think the current situation is bad for both you and me.”

“What do you mean by that? What are you saying?”

Not wanting to cause a scene in the café’s parking lot, Minato lightly shook off Ogiwara’s hand gripping his elbow. When he looked up, surprised to see the fingers that had been holding him had let go so easily, he met Ogiwara’s eyes. His eyes wore an unusually tense expression.

Realizing what was happening, Minato understood. Ogiwara was being overwhelmed by him. Thinking back, this was the first time in all their years, including the past ten years, that Minato had been so firm with Ogiwara.

Looking down at Minato, Ogiwara’s face was full of helplessness. He opened his mouth as if to say something but stopped, searching for the right words. He shook his head slightly and bit his lip.

“It’s not that you were at fault, Ogiwara-kun. After the accident, it was my fault for not properly apologizing. Even after meeting again after ten years, I just let things drag on, remaining vague and giving in. I… I really regret that now.”

A shadow of hurt passed over Ogiwara’s handsome face. The expression, which Minato had never seen before, made him look younger than his age. The feeling of still loving him was painful, but Minato didn’t consider turning back.

“Let’s erase everything and start from scratch. That would be the best.”

“………!”

In front of him, Ogiwara clenched his teeth. Minato heard a low growl from his throat, and then, to his surprise, Ogiwara shoved the envelope he had given back into Minato’s hands.

“Even so, this isn’t something I should accept. And I retract what I said earlier. I shouldn’t have said that. My knee getting damaged isn’t your fault, Sensei.”

“I can’t say the whole responsibility lies with me, but I can’t say it’s not mine at all either. This is my way of making things right, so I would be troubled if you return it to me.”

Minato pushed the envelope that had been forced into his hands back towards Ogiwara. After several exchanges of resistance, Ogiwara, showing no intention of giving in, spoke reluctantly.

“…Fine. I’ll accept this. But I don’t need anything more, and I absolutely won’t take any more. I’m sorry for being so stubborn.” Bending his tall frame, Ogiwara lowered his head. Watching him, Minato felt a wave of nostalgia.

Before they parted ten years ago, Ogiwara had been like this. Arrogant, outspoken, selfish, yet when it mattered, he could apologize sincerely. He would tease Minato, but he would never act out of unreasonable threats. He was a handsome, straightforward young man.

“I’m sorry for causing trouble… Well, then…” Minato couldn’t think of any other words to say. Without looking back, he turned and walked towards the station, leaving Ogiwara standing there.

The train Minato boarded was relatively empty, likely because it was a weekday afternoon. Gripping the handrail near the door, Minato gazed out the window at the clear sky.

This was it. It was over. He had struggled with it for a long time. Just a few days ago, he had been filled with uncertainty and self-deception, but the end came quickly. Thinking about it made him almost laugh.

He had loved Ogiwara for the past ten years. He had known it would never be reciprocated, but still, he couldn’t let go of his feelings.

―――The feelings you’ve forced down will remain deep inside you.

Yoshiharu was right. Feelings you can’t give up aren’t something you should keep holding on to. If it’s all going to end anyway, it’s better to let it all out and get it off your chest. Otherwise, you’ll carry it with you forever.

“…In the end, I couldn’t confess.”

If he were going to bring it all to an end, he had planned to confess. 

Saying there was no opportunity was just an excuse. Minato hadn’t been able to give up, no matter what. Rather than confessing and being hit with a definitive response, he had wanted to keep the feelings that remained ambiguous in his heart.

“Yoshiharu would probably be so disappointed.” His quiet voice was swallowed by the sound of the train, which resonated with the sway of the motion. With empty feelings, Minato continued to stare out the window. 

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Illustration 10:

Next update: 2026.09.10

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