Title: 谁把谁当真 (Winner Takes All)
Translator: 月野 見事 (TsukinoMigoto)
Protagonists ：黎朔 (LiShuo), 赵锦辛 (ZhaoJinXin)
Li Shuo felt the person in his arms breathing hard, but he gradually calmed down before he lets go of his hand that was trembling.
Wen Xiaohui turned around and hugged him, holding back his voice, but his tears fell uncontrollably, his shoulders twitched, and his heart is full of anger and pity for the man.
Li Shuo can hardly describe his mood at the moment. He couldn’t tell whether it is sadness, embarrassment, or anger that was more dominant. He only knew that it was like he is hollowed out and cold all over his body for the first time.
Zhao Jinxin knew his mind from beginning to end and also played with him from beginning to end.
From beginning to end, only he himself is confused, tangled, and struggling while Zhao Jinxin just copied him like a mirror.
When he proposed to rebuild trust, when he proposed to live together, and when he proposed to separate, Zhao Jinxin knew exactly what he was thinking and wanting, but he didn’t want to give it. He just haven’t played enough yet. It wasn’t until the end that there was nothing left that he can do that he resorted to a ‘confession’.
When he thinks of Zhao Jinxin’s affection at the time, he was touched and surprised but now he feels like he was going to vomit.
What kind of cold heart he owns that he can abuse others in this way?
Li Shuo has been generous and upright and kind to others all his life. The only people that had deliberately hurt him were the two brothers behind this door. One of them was the person he thought he was happy with.
The big boy who always acted like a baby in front of him, Zhao Jinxin, who had concealed himself perfectly, was trampling on his feelings with the most disgusting person he knew. They talked about him like they were talking about the weather, as if the talk was cheap enough to only appear in small talks, as if Zhao Jinxin didn’t care if his enemies would mock and despise him, as if his dignity was worthless.
No one has ever been able to humiliate him so far, and this person turned out to be the one he likes?
Thinking of the past… his tolerance, concession, and patience… remembering that he vowed to ‘tame’ Zhao Jinxin in front of Xiaohui, remembering that the two of them worked hard for Zhao Jinxin’s birthday these past few days, and now in front of his most hated enemy and in front of his closest friends, Zhao Jinxin had slapped him countless of times.
Li Shuo felt that his heart and lungs were about to explode. He wanted to leave this place immediately, but his legs were as if nailed into the floor, making him unable to move.
Go right away. Leave, leave this place. Don’t let him see. Don’t let him have another chance to humiliate you…, His mind was screaming.
“Li Shuo, let him go.”
A voice mixed with coldness like a sharp sword from another time and space suddenly spoke, severely splitting the quiet night and echoed in the empty corridor. It makes Li Shuo and Wen Xiaohui turn stiff and the ward that was separated by the door went quiet all of a sudden.
Li Shuo turned his head. Behind them, there stood a handsome young man. He did not know since when had he stood there. His fair jade-like skin still looked so transparent in the dim light, and his lips were sickly pale, but he had deep eyes. He was unusually sharp and bright, with a depth far beyond his age, as if he could pierce the flesh, pointing directly at people’s hearts, he was so good-looking, but he had a unique cold temperament.
He is Luo Yi…
Wen Xiaohui came back to his senses: “Luo Yi, you, how do you…?”
“You said you’d be back in three days.” Luo Yi looked at Li Shuo gloomily, “You didn’t say you were with him.”
The door of the ward was pushed open, and Zhao Jinxin ran out with a panic streaks on his face.
Li Shuo’s back froze. He didn’t have the courage to turn around. For the first time in his life, he felt so helpless and vulnerable that he had to hold Wen Xiaohui’s hand tightly.
Wen Xiaohui wiped his tears away fiercely: “Luo Yi, I’ll explain to you later.”
When everyone didn’t react, he picked up the trash can beside him with one hand and threw it at Zhao Jinxin.
Zhao Jinxin turned blue but managed to dodge and avoid it.
“Zhao Jinxin, I will fuck your ancestors until the eighteenth generation!” Wen Xiaohui yelled in a voice that was completely inconsistent with his feminine and beautiful appearance, and then he raised his fist and was about to go and pounce on him.
Li Shuo bit his lip and awakened all of his mind with enthusiasm. He then put on his last weapon, stood sideways in front of Wen Xiaohui, and whispered: “Okay, what’s done is done.”
“Zhao Jinxin, you wicked beast. You fucking jerk…Fuck you!” Wen Xiaohui was like a little beast that was completely irritated, shouting and cursing with his teeth and claws, “Zhao Jinxin–”
Luo Yi walked over, pushed Li Shuo unceremoniously, took a few steps back holding Wen Xiaohui, frowned and looked at Li Shuo, then looked at Zhao Jinxin: “What are you being crazy for? Who offended you?”
“He did! That’s him right there!” Wen Xiaohui pointed at Zhao Jinxin, “I will kill you!” He kicked the air and wanted to jump up, but he couldn’t move as Luo Yi has him in his arms.
“Xiaohui.” Li Shuo increased the volume of his voice, “I will handle it myself, okay?”
Wen Xiaohui looked at Li Shuo, tears swirling in his eyes again, his face is full of anger and grievance.
Li Shuo took a deep breath, turned around, and faced Zhao Jinxin.
Zhao Jinxin’s eyes were abnormally gloomy: “Li Shuo…”
Li Shuo straightened his clothes. He did not force himself to laugh. He can’t even pretend to laugh now: “Zhao Jinxin, I’m a little curious, when will you play enough?”
“I…” Zhao Jinxin’s tongue was like it got knotted. He was always clever and eloquent but at this time, there was no use for it. Li Shuo’s darkened eyes were like an invisible hand, strangling his throat.
“I have an enmity with Shao Qun, but I still tolerate it for you. Your family and mine are still family friends. Is it fun to tease me?” Every time Li Shuo utters a word, he feels that blood is bleeding somewhere in his body. It was like Zhao Jinxin is here to stab a knife through his heart, and he personally opened the flesh and dried it under the bright clear sky for everyone-the people he hated and the people he liked-to watch.
How could it hurt so much? How can I be so desperate…? He thought silently.
Zhao Jinxin clenched his fists and he is still unable to say a word.
Li Shuo held on to his final dignity, pretending to shrug his shoulders effortlessly: “Don’t worry, I, Li Shuo, can afford to play anytime. I will definitely not let you have the trouble of ‘getting rid of me’, so once I leave this hospital, don’t let me see you again.” He said flatly, “You disgust me.”
Zhao Jinxin’s face instantly turned pale, and he looked at Li Shuo deeply, the emotions leaking in his eyes looked quite complicated.
Li Shuo turned around and strode forward with all the pride of his life supporting him.
“Uncle Li.” Zhao Jinxin whispered, his voice sounded a little bit off.
Tears fell from Li Shuo’s eyes almost instantly.
But he did not hesitate, did not look back, and just move step by step forward away from Zhao Jinxin.
Wen Xiaohui stared at Zhao Jinxin with hatred: “Bitch, I wish you go to hell soon.” He turned to chase after Li Shuo.
Luo Yi took Wen Xiaohui’s hand with a look of innocence, and Wen Xiaohui calmed down a little bit: “Let’s go.”
As he gets into the elevator, Li Shuo leaned back on the elevator‘s wall and closed his eyes tiredly.
“Brother Li!” Wen Xiaohui supported his arm, “Are you okay? Don’t pay attention to what the beast said, he is not good enough for you, he and Shao Qun are all the same!”
Li Shuo looked at him faintly, only feeling like he is in a daze. He watched Wen Xiaohui’s lips move, but he didn’t respond enough to what Xiaohui was talking about.
Luo Yi coughed slightly and said coldly: “Brother Xiaohui, if you get close to him, I will get angry.”
“We will talk later.” Wen Xiaohui said to him without looking back.
Luo Yi narrowed his eyes, glared at Li Shuo, then squatted down while leaning on the elevator, with a painful gasp escaping from his throat.
Wen Xiaohui is stunned, ran over and said nervously, “My dear, what’s wrong with you? Is it your wound? Who the hell made you run here? You’re looking for trouble.”
Luo Yi hugged Wen Xiaohui: “It hurts.”
“I’ll check-in for you when I go downstairs. Remember what you promise me last time? You said you definitely won’t casually leave the hospital.”
“You said that you will be back in three days, but it had been five days. I checked and the surnamed Li is also here, what do you think I will think?”
“Think of a fart! If there’s really something between him and me, will I even be with you?”
Luo Yi moaned in pain again.
“It’s alright, let’s not talk about it.” Wen Xiaohui helped him up.
Li Shuo looked at them dumbly. The two people he once thought should not be together can make him feel envious. In contrast, how sad and ridiculous his feelings should be. He said weakly: “Xiaohui, you take him to the registration, I’ll go back to the hotel first, don’t worry about me, I’m fine.”
Li Shuo barely held the corner of his mouth and smiled slightly: “I want to be alone for a while.”
Wen Xiaohui nodded with red eyes.
The hospital is very close to the hotel. It was only less than two hundred meters away. But those two hundred meters seemed to be the longest path he had traveled in his life. His legs feel soft and empty. He is afraid he might fall at this point.
We normally only felt that weak when we were a child. He never thought that there will be such weakness in his older days. But a young child who falls down will receive mercy and encouragement. He is already this age, and if he falls, he will only gain sympathy and ridicule.
He resisted sympathy. He hated ridicule. But he had met them all overnight.
After 34 years of smooth sailing and a blessed life, he was played with feelings by a boy 11 years younger than himself. He deserved to be sympathized and laughed at.
He was so stupid that he was ashamed of himself.
When he reached the hotel room, Li Shuo packed his luggage, tore off the bow tie around his neck, threw the book that had been reading to Zhao Jinxin the night before into the trash can, and then left the room with his luggage.
Walking into the elevator, he was supposed to press the first floor, but his line of sight went all the way up, staying at the number 32, and he pressed it awkwardly.
Walking out of the elevator door, he looked at the double-opening solid wood door at the end of the corridor. It was the best suite in this hotel and the hotel suite he was most familiar with in his life. He was so familiar with the layout, structure and furniture of the room as long as he closed his eyes. He is very clear about the placement. For the past week, he has spent a lot of time in it every day, just to surprise the person he likes for a birthday.
But Zhao Jinxin had slapped him in the face.
He walked towards the suite step by step and swiped his room card to open the door.
In front of him is a whole wall of ‘Happy Birthday to Leon’ pieced together with peach-pink perfume lilies. The room is full of romantic balloons, ribbons, hearts, flowers, candles, graffiti, and hundreds of cute stuffed toy sheeps on the ground. The stuffed toys almost covering the entire room, they all have curly horns, hairy bodies and small black bean eyes, all of them looked naive and likable.
Surrounded by the stuffed toy sheeps, in the center is a dining table covered with a clean white tablecloth. On the table are two sets of exquisite relief bone china tableware.
Li Shuo thought about it seriously. In his past relationships, although he has always been generous, he has never worked so hard for anyone. The kind of doing something with full of joy and expectation is not pragmatic, purely romantic. He didn’t feel tired at all, and he might never have a chance to experience it again.
He put down his luggage, took off his suit jacket, unbuttoned a few buttons, and rolled up his sleeves. Then he strode over towards the furry little sheep, picked up the stool, and smashed it onto the dining table.
The loud noise of the collision was like the drum of battle, which instantly aroused all the madness in his body. He turned the stool and smashed everything he and Wen Xiaohui had carefully selected and arranged. The flowers on the wall, the vases that can be seen everywhere, the little ones with heart. Decorations, heart-shaped candlesticks, murals, ribbons, curtains, everything he could destroy, everything that left traces of the stupid things he did, he did everything he could to destroy them all.
He threw down the stool, picked up the graffiti paint bucket, and splashed it everywhere, especially over those sheep stuffed toys with innocent faces. The snow-white hair was instantly dyed with colorful colors, and the patches were soaked in the patter of paint. Here, this picture is embedded in a messy background, and it looks utterly sad.
Finally, Li Shuo exhausted his energy and sat down against the wall. He looked at his hand. He didn’t know when it was scratched, and it was stained with some paint. It was very dirty. He looked at the room again and all the things that was ruined by him. The messed-up suite, the more he looks at it, the blurrier his eyes are.
Why do you want to make yourself so embarrassed for someone who is not worthy of your love?… He thought quietly.
Li Shuo closed his eyes, and something hot and damp slid down his cheeks. He slammed the wall with the back of his head again and again. He yearned for the pain to switch with the severe pain in the heart, but it didn’t help.
Everything is too ugly. It really is too ugly.
The way he is now is the way he least wants to be in this life.
He wobbled up from the ground, grabbed his luggage and left the room.
He left a blank check at the hotel reception, and then left the place without looking back.
When Zhao Jinxin returned to the hotel, it was already very late.
He did not expect Li Shuo to be in the hotel, but when he returned to the guest room and looked at the empty room, he still felt extremely disappointed.
He simply packed his luggage and wanted to change into another room. If he stayed here all the time, he would inevitably think wildly of the past.
After finishing packing, he found a book in the trash can.
It was the book Li Shuo held and read to him the previous night. In order to create an atmosphere, he suddenly pretended to yell in his ear from time to time. How could he be frightened by this kind of thing, but he just done so to amuse Li Shuo.
He picked up the book and looked at the scary and bloody cover in silence. The book still had obvious signs of turning over. He could even imagine Li Shuo’s slender fingers holding the pages of the book, looking elegant and sexy. He turned and walked to his luggage with the book, but he stopped halfway again. Finally, he turned around again and threw the book back into the trash can.
Such a boring book, what are you keeping it for? He thought angrily.
He took his luggage and left the room.
As soon as the elevator door opened, there were six or seven cleaners standing inside, with full equipment in their hands, and almost filled the elevator. Zhao Jinxin frowned, but walked in and found that the elevator was going upstairs. The door was closed.
“I think he is mentally abnormal.” An aunt said.
“But I heard Xiaoli says that he is very handsome, has no problems with words and deeds, and is very rich.”
Zhao Jinxin froze.
“That kind of person must be crazy. I’ve seen this kind of act in TV. Why else do you put the room in such a way and smash it, and splash the paint on the whole room. It scared people to death.”
“You are imagining too much. He must be heartbroken in love. At first glance, it was to celebrate his girlfriend’s birthday. Ouch, it’s such a mess.”
Zhao Jinxin squeezed the luggage handle tightly. Seeing the elevator numbers jump to the top floor, he walked out with the group of cleaners.
The door at the end of the corridor was wide open, and he saw the splashed paint on the wall at a glance, and there were decorated petals on the messy wall, and he could vaguely recognize ‘happy birthday’ and his English name. His heart tightened, and even his breathing trembled, and he walked towards the suite step by step unwillingly.
The suite looks really scary. He doesn’t know what kind of anger there is to have such destructive power, which makes people feel particularly depressed.
“Sir, we want to clean the room, don’t watch the excitement here.”
“Who booked this room?” Zhao Jinxin opened his mouth and found that his voice was shaking.
“A guest who had just checked out, hey, lost a lot of money, I don’t know what he is thinking.”
Zhao Jinxin’s gaze fell on the pile of stuffed toy sheeps soaked in paint.
Today is his birthday, he actually had forgotten it until when his mother called him in the morning. He didn’t expect Li Shuo to know…
No wonder he was dressed so nicely today and even wore a beautiful bow tie…
Zhao Jinxin recalled Li Shuo’s appearance, and the corners of his mouth raised, but he remembered the pain and submission in Li Shuo’s eyes again, and he couldn’t smile anymore.
He put down his luggage and walked through the mess, not caring that the paint ruined his shoes and trousers. Even if it has become a garbage dump now, he can roughly restore their beautiful appearance in his mind.
He looked at his watch. It was not past 12 a.m. yet. Today, he was supposed to have a romantic surprise birthday with a gentle and perfect lover.
But now there is nothing left.
He squatted down and picked up a stuffed toy sheep.
It was the cleanest of all the toys. It was only sprayed with a little paint stain. Most of the hair was still white and soft, and there was a naive smile on it.
Zhao Jinxin pressed the little sheep to his chest and lowered his head heavily.
There was a petting voice echoing in his mind, saying “My sweet Lamb“. That was his own voice.
Li Shuo got off the plane, returned home in a hurry, took a hot bath and then fell on the bed, sleeping under the dim light.
When he woke up again, it was already noon the next day. He slept for almost 24 hours, but he still felt very tired, as if he could not wash away the tiredness no matter how much he rested, and his head was groggy. He doesn’t want to do anything, so he lies in bed in a daze.
He doesn’t know how long time had passed before the doorbell rang.
The sound was like a sound from the sky, and it took a long time to reach his ears, and from the ears to the brain, he realized that it was a doorbell, and time seemed to have gone by for a century.
Li Shuo got up from the bed and swayed as he walks to open the door.
Wen Xiaohui holding two large plastic bags in his hands, standing at the door and seemed relieved to have seen at him.
Li Shuo whispered: “You’ve flown back.”
“I called you all day but your phone is turned off. Are you trying to scare me to death?” Wen Xiaohui squeezed himself in involuntarily.
Li Shuo laughed self-deprecatingly: “What are you worried about? I’m such a big person.” No one should be worried about him. He can’t think about it. It’s just ridiculous.
“I’m just worried about you. Why do you look so bad?” Wen Xiaohui opened the plastic bag and took out the food and drink. “I know you didn’t eat at first sight, and your face is too ugly.”
Li Shuo scratched his head: “I’m sorry that you had to see this. I will wash my face.”
Wen Xiaohui turned around and whispered: “Brother Li, we have been friends for so many years. You have seen me at my most embarrassing moment and you have not laughed at me. You have helped me so much. If you really treat me as a friend, no need to force yourself in front of me, okay.”
Li Shuo looked at him blankly, and then nodded slightly. He really didn’t have the energy to pretend to be chic, he even felt tired from walking.
Wen Xiaohui pursed his lips and smiled: “I’m bad at cooking so I don’t want to poison you. I packed a lot of food and they taste good. Let’s eat together.”
Li Shuo faced a table of delicious food, but he didn’t have any appetite, and he didn’t feel hungry, which was strange.
Wen Xiaohui put the chopsticks into his hand: “Come and eat. Or do you want me to feed you?”
Li Shuo picked up a piece of meat and stuffed it into his mouth, but couldn’t taste it well. He didn’t want Wen Xiaohui to worry and didn’t intend to starve himself to death, so he reluctantly started eating.
“In the past few days, if you don’t want to go out, I will bring you food and come to accompany you on my way.”
Li Shuo looked up at him: “You come to see me, will Luo Yi agree?”
Hearing this, Wen Xiaohui’s expression became a little bit twisted, he shrugged, pretending to say lightly: “Oh, even with him nagging, he can’t do anything to me anyway.”
Li Shuo said softly: “Xiaohui, thank you, but I really have nothing to do. I just take a few days off and don’t want to make it difficult for you.”
“There is nothing difficult for me to do, you don’t need to care.” Wen Xiaohui picked a piece of spare ribs and placed it in his bowl, “Quickly eat this, it is delicious. After eating, let’s watch a movie. I brought a bunch of comedies.”
After eating, Wen Xiaohui took Li Shuo to watch the movie. Li Shuo always felt that his mind was dizzy and he couldn’t see any plot on the screen. After the movie was halfway through, Wen Xiaohui let him go to sleep.
Li Shuo was lying on the bed, listening to Wen Xiaohui rushing in and out to clean up the room for him, and he was very moved. There is a person by his side, noisy and is very good to him. But unfortunately, this person does not belong to him. No one belongs to him and he is still alone after all.
Next Update: 2021/8/9
*Translator’s Note: Chinese has a way to curse people out using ancestors or elders in your family. It is a very offensive insult for them. I wanted to change that into cursing like how Westerners would normally curse like but I decided not to because I think that particular curse by Xiaohui has a precise depth to it. ZJX deserves that. Oh well… And whew… this is such a long chapter, my eyes are red. And here after, let’s see how our ML will be driven into a wall finding his ways to get back into the life of MC nyahahahahaha! You should know how all of Shui Qian Cheng’s MLs are like…