WBAI Chapter 64

A quick trip out and somehow they ended up spending thousands of yuan.

Xie An’yu sat in the passenger seat, glancing back at the pillow and the three tightly wrapped vases in the rear. His feelings were somewhat complicated.

Yu Feng checked the time on the center console screen and took advantage of the red light to call his mother’s caregiver.

The phone rang for a few seconds before the caregiver’s voice came through the car’s speakers. “Hello? Mr. Yu?”

“Auntie Lin, I’ll be coming tomorrow morning to pick up my mom and take her to the hospital to get her cast removed. Could you let her know?”

“Oh, okay.”

Yu Feng hung up the phone. Xie An’yu turned to look at him.

Having to relay even something as simple as taking his mother to the hospital through someone else—just how strained was Yu Feng’s relationship with his mother?

“Brother, do you never contact your mom normally?” This was the first time Xie An’yu had actively brought up Yu Feng’s family matters.

“She doesn’t use a phone,” Yu Feng replied. “And even if we did talk, we wouldn’t have much to say to each other.”

“When you were little… did she hit you often?”

Yu Feng turned to look at him and chuckled. “Did Zhou Yi tell you that? Yeah, she did, but it wasn’t as bad as you’re imagining.”

By that time, Yu Feng was already in high school. He was taller than most boys his age—no longer a fragile child. Even if Wang Minying was drunk and throwing a tantrum, she couldn’t just hit him whenever she wanted. At most, she’d throw things or scream in his face.

But she had indeed hit him—she’d slapped him, even thrown things at his head. Every single time, it was because of Cheng Sheng.

Xie An’yu, unusually agitated, pressed, “That scar on your arm is so obvious, and you’re saying it wasn’t that bad? Does she have to kill you for it to count as bad?”

Yu Feng glanced at him.

Xie An’yu’s brows were tightly furrowed. “How exactly did you get that scar on your arm?”

“I think I’ve told you before—my mom hit me with a vase.” Yu Feng paused. “Did Zhou Yi tell you about Cheng Sheng?”

Xie An’yu nodded.

“After Cheng Sheng’s dad left, my mother always wanted to send him away. At the time, she was still legally married to that man, so she had an obligation to take care of Cheng Sheng. Sending him away would’ve been abandonment. She told me she was going to send Cheng Sheng to the countryside to be raised by my grandparents, but I knew she didn’t want Cheng Sheng to have any connection to our family anymore. There was no way she’d actually send him to my grandma’s place.”

Back then, Wang Minying had secretly sent Cheng Sheng away without telling Yu Feng. Later, she claimed he’d been sent to his grandmother’s in the countryside. Yu Feng called to confirm, and his grandmother also said that Cheng Sheng was with her, telling him and his mother to focus on their own lives and not worry too much.

Yu Feng’s grandma lived in another city, far from Beicheng. Yu Feng took two days off and went to her place, but he didn’t see Cheng Sheng there.

He wasn’t surprised. He’d already guessed Cheng Sheng wouldn’t be there. He just couldn’t believe his mother would actually do something like that and wanted to see for himself.

This was the event that permanently soured his relationship with his mother.

“How did you find him later?”

“I called the police.”

Yu Feng’s answer wasn’t unexpected, but Xie An’yu was still a bit shocked. If Yu Feng’s mother’s actions were judged as child abandonment, she could’ve faced legal responsibility. Calling the police was essentially pushing their mother-son relationship past the point of no return.

“The report was for a missing person,” Yu Feng continued.

“She was furious, asking me if I wouldn’t be satisfied until I sent my own mother to jail.” Yu Feng’s face remained expressionless. “If I had really wanted to send her in, why would I have reported him as a missing person?”

The injury on Yu Feng’s arm was from the day he called the police—his mother had smashed a vase against him.

Wang Minying had indeed sent Cheng Sheng to the town where Yu Feng’s grandmother lived, but she had also arranged for him to stay with a local couple who couldn’t have children. Her emotions were unstable, and she had thought everything would be that simple. She didn’t want to see Cheng Sheng, didn’t want to live with him, wanted to get rid of him, but she couldn’t bring herself to be truly cruel.

By then, Cheng Sheng had already lost his hearing. Without Yu Feng, he wouldn’t have survived.

It wasn’t long before the family discovered Cheng Sheng’s hearing impairment and contacted Wang Minying, demanding she take the child back. They admitted they couldn’t accept a disabled child, adding that the boy hadn’t spoken a word since arriving, refused to eat, didn’t cry or try to escape—just sat in the room staring out the window, looking utterly pitiful.

Wang Minying had no other choice. If Cheng Sheng had stayed there any longer, Yu Feng’s police report would have escalated beyond just a missing person case.

Yu Feng brought Cheng Sheng back. When Cheng Sheng threw himself into Yu Feng’s arms, he was as thin as a skeleton.

Yu Feng had never blamed his mother. No one could endure what she went through—she was a victim. How could she possibly treat the perpetrator’s son with normalcy?

And in the years after Cheng Sheng passed away, she had lived with guilt. Yu Feng wasn’t blind to that.

His mother was innocent. Cheng Sheng was innocent too. He couldn’t choose between the two of them.

The unfortunate thing was that at the time, he didn’t have the ability to take Cheng Sheng away from his mother’s life. By the time he did have that ability, Cheng Sheng was already gone.

There are many moments in a person’s life when they feel helpless, but compared to that, the inevitability of loss is even more despairing.

Yu Feng recalled what happened four months ago. “You once said your parents and grandmother would reunite in another world. I wonder if they’ll meet Cheng Sheng there.”

“They will,” Xie An’yu said. “Since we’ve met, they’ll definitely meet too.”

They’ll reunite in another world, while I stay by your side in this one.

Yu Feng paused outside the convenience store near their apartment complex and asked Xie An’yu, “Want to go in and buy some Koukou¹扣扣 (Kòu kòu): (Internet slang) QQ instant messenger. Tencent QQ (Chinese: 腾讯QQ), also known as QQ, is an instant messaging software service and web portal developed by the Mainland Chinese technology company Tencent. QQ offers services that provide online social games, music, shopping, microblogging, movies, and group and voice chat software. candy?”

Whenever Yu Feng said ‘Koukou candy’, Xie An’yu couldn’t help but smile. The pronunciation was just too funny.

“I’ve had too many lately, ate a month’s worth in a few days,” Xie An’yu said. “I have to show some restraint these days.”

“Having to show restraint for Koukou candy? Such a good boy.” Yu Feng leaned in close, lowering his voice. “But you weren’t so restrained when we were doing that, were you?”

Xie An’yu froze, instantly understanding what he meant, his neck stiffening as he stayed silent.

Yu Feng moved even closer, brushing a light kiss against his lips. Xie An’yu met his gaze, confident and justified: “I’m young.”

Yu Feng snorted, giving him an out, nodding his head. “Mm, so full of energy that needs to be released.”

The ‘out’ was worse than none at all. Xie An’yu kicked it right over.

“You make it feel good,” he stated bluntly, throwing in a compliment about Yu Feng’s hand skills.

Yu Feng narrowed his eyes. “Xie An’yu, I always thought you were pretty reserved.”

“You’re not just anyone,” Xie An’yu murmured, lowering his gaze to avoid Yu Feng’s eyes.

Xie An’yu actually had a rather strong personality—not soft or weak at all. His appearance might suggest otherwise, but his reserved nature stemmed from being somewhat closed off. He disliked drawing attention to himself and hated when others probed his boundaries. As he had said, Yu Feng wasn’t just anyone—Yu Feng was his boyfriend. His boundaries didn’t apply to Yu Feng, so there was no need for him to act coy in front of him.

They were both men, so Yu Feng naturally knew how to make things feel good and where to touch. Xie An’yu, on the other hand, seemed as if he’d never done that kind of thing to himself before. When he had helped Yu Feng before, he had been clumsy, even squeezing too hard at first.

Yu Feng asked Xie An’yu, “Have you rarely done this for yourself before?”

Xie An’yu lifted his eyelids briefly before lowering them again, admitting honestly, “Mm.”

“It’s fine. I’ll teach you slowly from now on.”

Yu Feng thought to himself, I know a lot more—I can teach you everything, bit by bit, in the future.

Xie An’yu’s pride as a man seemed slightly wounded. “…It’s not like I don’t know how.”

Yu Feng raised an eyebrow and hummed in agreement. “You do? Then why did you squeeze me so hard it hurt?”

Xie An’yu froze for a moment before an awkward expression gradually spread across his face.

“Who taught you to squeeze giving someone a handjob?” Yu Feng murmured in his ear. “You’re a truly pure, good boy.”

Xie An’yu turned his head slightly, his lips almost brushing Yu Feng’s cheek. “A good boy wouldn’t give a handjob to another man.”

Yu Feng chuckled softly, his breath tickling Xie An’yu’s ear.

***

There were carts in the residential complex for residents to collect their packages. Yu Feng placed the three vases and the pillow into one of them. While riding the elevator up, Xie An’yu received a call from Jiang Ting.

“An’yu, are you busy?”

“No, I’m not.”

“I haven’t reached out to you in a while. I called today to talk about the next photo shoot.” Jiang Ting said. “Yu Feng went on a trip a few days ago—you knew about that, right?”

“Mm.”

How could I not? I went with him, Xie An’yu thought.

“He’s back today, so we need to get the shoot scheduled. You’ll need to come to the company tomorrow for a fitting to try on the outfits for this issue.”

“Mm, got it.” Xie An’yu remembered this was a duo shoot. “Will the other model be there too?”

“You mean Tang Shu? No, she won’t be coming,” Jiang Ting chuckled. “She’s a big name—she gets special privileges. She never attends fittings during the prep stage, doesn’t even try on the outfits.”

Perhaps worried Xie An’yu might feel slighted, Jiang Ting encouraged him, “You’re just starting out in this industry, but don’t worry. With your incredible looks, you’ll definitely go far. It’s only a matter of time before you become a top model.”

Xie An’yu didn’t feel slighted at all—he was just a little annoyed at having to interact with strangers again and wanted to mentally prepare himself.

“Mm, I understand.”

With a ‘ding’, the elevator doors opened. Xie An’yu hung up and slipped his phone back into his pocket.

He hadn’t brought this up with Yu Feng before, but now he mentioned it. “Brother, did you know about me shooting a magazine cover?”

Yu Feng smiled. “I’m your photographer—how could I not know? Was that Jiang Ting on the phone just now?”

Xie An’yu nodded. “She wants me to come to the company for a fitting tomorrow. Will you be there?”

“You want me to go?”

“I was just asking if you were going…”

“Generally, I don’t go. But if you want me to, I will.” Although Yu Feng had the authority to select models and decide their participation, this power was inconsequential to him. The quality of the photos didn’t depend much on the models—it ultimately came down to the photographer’s skill. He was merely a recorder, not a judge in a beauty pageant.

Xie An’yu thought for a moment and said, “Forget it, you’d better not go.”

Yu Feng laughed. “Why?”

“It would be too awkward.”

Yu Feng walked to the door, scanned his fingerprint to unlock it, took the items from the cart, and stepped inside to change his shoes. He left the cart outside. Xie An’yu asked, “Don’t you need to return the cart?”

“No, the property management will come and collect it later.”

“Their service is that good?”

“Such expensive property fees aren’t paid for nothing.”

Yu Feng unwrapped the bouquet of daisies, trimmed them, and arranged them in the newly bought vase, placing it on the coffee table in the living room. He checked his watch—it was almost 5:30. Zhou Yi had also just sent him a WeChat message.

Yu Feng took a bottle of wine from the liquor cabinet and said to Xie An’yu, “We should get going.”

Xie An’yu glanced at the red wine in his hand, puzzled. “You drink red wine with hot pot?”

Yu Feng hummed in response and talked nonsense with a perfectly straight face, “And it absolutely has to be an ’82 Lafite²八二年的拉菲 (bā’èr nián de lā fēi): an internet term, which refers to 1982 vintage of Château Lafite Rothschild. Château Lafite Rothschild is a French wine estate of Bordeaux wine, located in Pauillac in France, owned by members of the Rothschild family since the 19th century, and rated as a First Growth under the 1855 Bordeaux Classification. Lafite was one of five wine-producing châteaux of Bordeaux originally awarded First Growth status in the 1855 Classification. Since then, it has been a consistent producer of one of the world’s most expensive red wines. A bottle of 1869 Château Lafite Rothschild holds the world record for the most expensive bottle of wine sold at auction for $233,973 in 2010. In China, this term become a synonym for high standards and is often used to highlight a person’s extravagance and taste in reference to the scene in God of Gamblers where Chow Yun-fat asked for a bottle of Lafite ’82. This line was never spoken by Chow Yun-fat, but rather added as a subtitle.
.”

Xie An’yu chuckled. “Are you messing with me again?”

Yu Feng looked at him and smiled. “Can’t exactly bring a bottle of Erguotou³二鍋頭 (èr guō tóu): erguotou (a sorghum distilled liquor); (figurative, slang, derogatory) someone who remarries. Erguotou (Chinese: 二鍋頭; pinyin: èrguōtóu; lit. ‘second pot head’, ‘i.e. second distillation’) is a style of qingxiang baijiu originating in Beijing and primarily made in the region surrounding.
when mooching a meal at someone’s place, can we?”

“Is this wine very expensive?”

“It’s alright.”

***

‘Alright’ was an understatement—the bottle of wine cost nearly half of Professor Zhou’s salary for several months. Zhou Yi knew nothing about wine, but he was certain Yu Feng wouldn’t give him something cheap. It was Shi Wuyang who recognized it as a fine vintage at a glance.

Zhou Yi, who didn’t know its value, gave the bottle to Shi Wuyang after dinner, a classic case of borrowing flowers to offer to Buddha. He did it right in front of Yu Feng, too.

Shi Wuyang was taken aback. “What are you doing?”

“I don’t drink much anyway. Take it back with you.”

Shi Wuyang lowered his voice. “Do you know how expensive this is?”

“Which is why it’d be wasted on me.” Zhou Yi grinned. “Someone like you who appreciates wine should take it.”

Zhou Yi wasn’t oblivious to Yu Feng’s little schemes. This guy had never given him wine before and knew he wasn’t a drinker. Suddenly bringing a bottle today—was it meant to pass through his hands to Shi Wuyang, or just to watch him and Shi Wuyang bicker?

He was full of bad intentions.

Yu Feng spoke up. “Since he doesn’t know what it’s worth, you should just take it back with you, Professor Shi.”

“How is that appropriate?”

“There’s nothing inappropriate about it. None of us here know anything about wine, so it would be a waste for anyone else to have it.”

“Exactly.” Zhou Yi shoved the bottle into Shi Wuyang’s hands. “Take it—don’t drop it.”

Shi Wuyang smiled and no longer refused. “Thank you. I’ll treat you to a meal another time.”

“How come you’re not thanking me?” Zhou Yi piped up again, fishing for attention. “This was given to you in my name.”

Shi Wuyang glanced at him and laughed. “Thank you too. Put this meal on my tab—next time at the faculty cafeteria, it’s on my card.”

“Damn,” Zhou Yi laughed, thoroughly amused. “Do you have to be so biased?”

After Shi Wuyang left, Zhou Yi lightly kicked Yu Feng’s leg. “Are you that bored?”

Yu Feng turned to look at him.

Zhou Yi pointed at him: “You’re just stirring up trouble, and you even bring me a bottle of wine just for show.”

“Anyway, I wasn’t going to drink that wine. Giving it to Professor Shi was the perfect solution, wasn’t it?”

Zhou Yi shot him a sidelong glance: “And you just had to use me to give it to him, right?”

“The wine’s in your hands. It’s not like I forced you to give it away.”

Zhou Yi gestured toward the door: “Why don’t you and your kid make a graceful exit?”

***

Xie An’yu and Yu Feng returned home reeking of hot pot. Yu Feng didn’t eat spicy food, so Zhou Yi had prepared a split pot. Only Yu Feng had been dipping into the mild broth side, while Xie An’yu’s lips were flushed red from the spice. When Yu Feng tried to kiss him after they got home, Xie An’yu refused—somehow suddenly self-conscious—claiming he smelled and needed to shower first. He’d let Yu Feng kiss him afterward.

While waiting for Xie An’yu to finish showering, Yu Feng took a shower himself. Afterward, he went to the study, turned on his computer, and started browsing through the photos he’d taken at Shuangye Isle. When Xie An’yu came out and didn’t see him, he checked his own room and found that Yu Feng had already put the newly bought pillowcase on his pillow and placed it on his bed.

Xie An’yu plopped down onto the bed.

What was the point of him showering so meticulously?

Judging by this, it seemed Yu Feng didn’t plan on sleeping with him tonight.

Xie An’yu picked up his phone and sent Yu Feng a WeChat message.

Xie An’yu: 【Are you asleep?】

Yu Feng was looking at the photos when he heard his phone vibrate. He glanced down.

Yu Feng: 【Not asleep】

Yu Feng: 【Haven’t even gotten to kiss you yet】

Yu Feng: 【You think I can sleep like this?】

Xie An’yu: 【*.*】

Yu Feng: 【You’ve even learned to act cute now】

Yu Feng: 【I’m in the study】

Yu Feng: 【Come here】

Three minutes later, Xie An’yu walked into the study, hugging the new pillow.

Yu Feng chuckled when he saw the pillow in his hands. “You don’t have to be that attached to it.”

Xie An’yu walked over silently, still clutching the pillow.

“Are you working?”

“No, I’m looking at the photos I took before.”

Yu Feng stepped on the floor and pushed his chair back slightly, making space on his lap for Xie An’yu.

“Come here,” Yu Feng said.

Xie An’yu stood still for a moment.

“Want to sit on my lap?”

Yu Feng always asked Xie An’yu things like ‘Do you want to?‘ ‘Is this okay?‘ ‘Is that alright?‘ before doing anything. On the surface, it seemed like he was giving Xie An’yu the choice, but in reality, Xie An’yu was being led by the nose every step of the way—and he was perfectly willing.

When Xie An’yu leaned into Yu Feng’s embrace, he was still holding the pillow. Yu Feng wrapped an arm around his waist and chuckled deeply against his shoulder. “Are you planning on sleeping here tonight?”

Xie An’yu pressed his lips together. He wasn’t planning to sleep there—he was planning to sleep wherever Yu Feng slept.

The pillow was in the way, so Yu Feng grabbed it and tossed it onto the nearby couch before pulling Xie An’yu fully into his arms from behind.

Xie An’yu smelled fresh and clean from the shower. His hair was half-dry, the ends soft and fragrant.

Still a young man’s frame, his shoulders and back were slightly slender.

Yu Feng’s arms circled Xie An’yu’s waist, feeling his body gradually grow warmer.

His sun-kissed skin was undeniably alluring—even his ears turning red wasn’t obvious, his shyness hidden away quietly.

List of Idiom in Chapter 64

弱不禁風 (ruò bù jīn fēng): too weak to stand up to the wind (idiom); be too weak to withstand a gust of wind—be extremely delicate; be frail physically; having so delicate a constitution as to be unable to stand any breeze; being too frail to withstand even a gust of wind (of a person, e.g. a woman or a patient, of a structure, etc.); fragile state of health; describe a person who is so weak that he cannot even withstand the wind. First attested in a Southern Song poem by Lu You: 白菡萏香初過雨，紅蜻蜓弱不禁風。, White lotus flowers being fragrant right after rain; red dragonflies fail to stand the wind.

眉頭緊鎖 (méi tóu jǐn suǒ): with knitted brows; to frown (because you are thinking carefully, or because you are angry or worried); used to describe a person’s facial expression of frowning when encountering difficulties or unhappy things. This idiom conveys a state of sadness, boredom, or anxiety through the body language of frowning brows, and is often used in literary works to describe the demeanor of characters.

無能為力 (wú néng wéi lì): impotent (idiom); powerless; helpless; incapable of action; being unable to use one’s strength or ability to help, and describes the inability to complete a task or solve a problem. Its connotation emphasizes the state of being weak or unable to exert one’s power. It can be used to refer to the situation of being helpless under the constraints of subjective conditions or objective lack of ability.

理直氣壯 (lǐ zhí qì zhuàng): in the right and self-confident (idiom); bold and confident with justice on one’s side; to have the courage of one’s convictions; just and forceful; with justice on one’s side and in an assertive tone.

扭扭捏捏 (niǔ niǔ niē niē): to pretend to be shy, coy or embarrassed; affecting shyness or embarrassment; to mince (when walking, talking, etc); be bashful; act demure; be affectedly modest; be prudish; be selfconscious; refers to the deliberate twisting and swaying of the body while walking, but also focuses on describing a person’s pretentious and unexpressive behavior.

清心寡慾 (qīng xīn guǎ yù): (idiom) uninterested in self-indulgence; to cleanse one’s mind of distracting thoughts and limit one’s worldly desires; abstemious; ascetic; have a pure heart and few worldly desires.

可有可無 (kě yǒu kě wú): dispensable; inessential; be as well without it as with it―not essential; not indispensable; you can have it or not; it doesn’t matter whether you have it or not; optional; unnecessary; inconsequential; indifferent; the existence or non-existence of something has no substantial impact on the whole.

胡說八道 (hú shuō bā dào): to talk nonsense; rubbish; balderdash; twaddle; sheer nonsense; all baloney; refers to groundless or illogical remarks, with a derogatory meaning. The core meaning of this idiom is random speech that goes against the facts.

借花獻佛 (jiè huā xiàn fó): lit. to borrow flowers to offer to Buddha; to offer something that one has received (as a gift, favour, etc.) to someone else; make a gift of sth given by another; present Buddha with flowers given by another—make a gift of sth. given by another; offer a present to a guest with other people’s things; make presents provided by sb. else; a metaphor for using other people’s things to do favors.

假模假樣 (jiǎ mó jiǎ yàng): to behave in an affected way; to put on an act; pretentious; insincere; phony; artificial; hypocritical. Its core meaning is “to pretend to be something in order to show off”.

愛不釋手 (ài bù shì shǒu): to love something too much to part with it (idiom); to fondle admiringly; be so fond of sth that one will not let go of it; loved too much to let go; to like something so much that you are reluctant to let it go.

心甘情願 (xīn gān qíng yuàn): delighted to (do sth, idiom); to be more than willing to do something; to be perfectly happy to do something; perfectly happy to do; most willing to do; be only too glad/pleased (to do sth); you are completely willing in your heart, without any force. Mostly refers to voluntarily making some kind of sacrifice.

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• 1
  扣扣 (Kòu kòu): (Internet slang) QQ instant messenger. Tencent QQ (Chinese: 腾讯QQ), also known as QQ, is an instant messaging software service and web portal developed by the Mainland Chinese technology company Tencent. QQ offers services that provide online social games, music, shopping, microblogging, movies, and group and voice chat software.
• 2
  八二年的拉菲 (bā’èr nián de lā fēi): an internet term, which refers to 1982 vintage of Château Lafite Rothschild. Château Lafite Rothschild is a French wine estate of Bordeaux wine, located in Pauillac in France, owned by members of the Rothschild family since the 19th century, and rated as a First Growth under the 1855 Bordeaux Classification. Lafite was one of five wine-producing châteaux of Bordeaux originally awarded First Growth status in the 1855 Classification. Since then, it has been a consistent producer of one of the world’s most expensive red wines. A bottle of 1869 Château Lafite Rothschild holds the world record for the most expensive bottle of wine sold at auction for $233,973 in 2010. In China, this term become a synonym for high standards and is often used to highlight a person’s extravagance and taste in reference to the scene in God of Gamblers where Chow Yun-fat asked for a bottle of Lafite ’82. This line was never spoken by Chow Yun-fat, but rather added as a subtitle.
  
• 3
  二鍋頭 (èr guō tóu): erguotou (a sorghum distilled liquor); (figurative, slang, derogatory) someone who remarries. Erguotou (Chinese: 二鍋頭; pinyin: èrguōtóu; lit. ‘second pot head’, ‘i.e. second distillation’) is a style of qingxiang baijiu originating in Beijing and primarily made in the region surrounding.