Morning and Chapter 37

Yang Xiaozhen was carrying a bag of fruit of every kind. She walked in and set it on the coffee table.

He Mu hurriedly took the teapot to boil water and secretly sent a text to Chang Ming’an saying that his mother had arrived. Then he did not dare return to the living room. He could only stand guard over the kettle, waiting for it to boil, and brew a pot of black tea before carrying it out.

Yang Xiaozhen sat on the sofa, washed her hands, peeled a piece of the fruit she had brought, and just as she had done last time, naturally cut off a slice and held it out to He Mu. He was completely flustered, trying to take the apple while also pouring the tea. In his haste the tea spilled from the spout onto the table.

Yang Xiaozhen exclaimed, “Oh dear!” He Mu was so nervous he almost cried. Afraid of upsetting her, he jumped up again, grabbed five or six tissues, soaked up the spilled tea, and threw the wet crumpled mass into the trash. Mu Mu, who had been following at his heels, peeked into the bin the moment the tissues went in. Afraid she would knock it over, He Mu quickly picked her up, sat down, and poured another cup of tea.

He was still holding the apple Yang Xiaozhen had offered him; it had already begun to turn slightly yellow. He wanted to take it properly, yet he was holding the cat, so he had to set her down, wash his hands in a rush, and only then accept the fruit.

The whole sequence left him even more nervous. He sat there taking small bites of the apple without saying a word.

Yang Xiaozhen took a sip of tea and asked, “What’s your name?”

Like a primary-school student called on by the teacher, He Mu answered obediently, “He Mu, the Mu of mousse cake.”

“Oh.” She asked again, “Are your parents all right?”

The question caught him off guard. He lowered his head and found it difficult to speak. At last he whispered, “My mother has passed away.”

Yang Xiaozhen was somewhat taken aback. Chang Ming’an had told her earlier that He Mu’s family was having difficulties and that was why he was staying here. He had not specified what those difficulties were. She had subconsciously assumed he was hiding something, yet she had not expected it to be true. Instinctively she asked, “Where’s your father?”

He Mu was even more at a loss for words. He could only shake his head and shift restlessly in his chair. Yang Xiaozhen sighed deeply, unable to utter any unpleasant remark, and the two of them sat facing each other in silence.

He Mu did not know what she was thinking. He looked up and found her lost in thought, so he sat still as well. Finally he could sit no longer. He picked a bright red pomegranate from the fruit she had brought, cut it open, carefully peeled out the small seeds, placed them in a white porcelain bowl, and pushed the whole bowl toward her. “Auntie, please have some.”

Yang Xiaozhen looked up at him, scrutinizing the neatly tied ponytail and the undisguised nervousness and eagerness to please in his eyes. At last she sighed once more.

Chang Ming’an returned at that moment. He had left the meeting early and driven straight back. He rushed in and saw the two of them sitting opposite each other without speaking. He was stunned for a second, then called out “Mom” and asked, “Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?”

Yang Xiaozhen stood up, pushed him into the kitchen, and closed the door.

He Mu sat alone in the living room. He wanted to go over and listen yet felt it would be wrong. After a long struggle he finally moved to the door and stood there quietly.

“You’re such a good kid, how could you…” Yang Xiaozhen’s voice choked. “I’ve thought about what you said yesterday for a long time.”

Chang Ming’an answered, “Please go ahead.”

“As long as you’re happy, I don’t care who you’re with. But you’re a teacher at a school. How can you be completely indifferent to what others say about you and what they think of you?”

He was silent for a while, then said, “I’ve thought it all through. My main source of income is doing business economic model analysis. I teach because I like it, so I’ve kept doing it. If it really doesn’t work out, I can leave the university.”

“You…”

He spoke calmly. “Life is never perfect. To choose one thing you have to give up another. I want to be with him, maybe for a lifetime.”

Yang Xiaozhen was speechless for a long time before she finally said, “If you’ve thought it through, then that’s fine.”

Chang Ming’an added, “Let’s go on a trip together when we have a holiday. Anywhere is fine.”

“Okay.”

When the two came out He Mu was sitting on the sofa. Seeing that Yang Xiaozhen was about to leave, he quickly stood up and, together with Chang Ming’an, saw her to the door and pressed the elevator button. At the parting she hugged her son, then looked at He Mu standing to the side and hugged him as well.

He Mu sniffed and whispered, “Goodbye, Auntie.”

After they had seen her off the two returned home and remained silent for a moment. The air conditioner was set to a warm temperature. Chang Ming’an’s nose felt dry and uncomfortable, so he rubbed it. He Mu took the remote and lowered the temperature several degrees. Seeing this, Chang Ming’an said, “Turn it up a bit. You’ll get cold later.”

He Mu did not answer. Instead he turned the air conditioner off altogether. The warm current stopped at once and the room fell very quiet.

“What’s wrong?”

Chang Ming’an picked up the remote and switched the unit back on. He Mu had already gone into the bedroom by himself, crawled under the covers, pulled the blanket over his head, and curled into a tight ball, looking as though he wanted neither to speak nor to move. Chang Ming’an followed him in, patted his shoulder, and asked, “What’s wrong? Are you feeling unwell?”

He Mu sat up all at once and threw off the covers. His hair was a mess, yet his expression was serious, brows drawn together. He said earnestly, “You don’t tell me anything.”

Chang Ming’an answered, “How come…”

“I have no idea what you told your mother or what your plans are. You didn’t even tell me the heating was too high so I could put on another layer. Do you treat me like a child…” He Mu rarely raised his voice, but as he spoke the grievance rose in him. His nose wrinkled and his eyes reddened.

Chang Ming’an panicked and tried to pull him into a hug, but He Mu pushed him away. He could only whisper, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry…”

The moment he heard the apology He Mu could hold back no longer. He reached out, wrapped both arms around Chang Ming’an’s neck, buried his face against his shoulder, and bit him in angry protest. “You have to tell me everything, and I will tell you everything too.”

Chang Ming’an had kept silent before because he was afraid He Mu would overthink and feel upset. After this small storm he realized that an equal, honest relationship—one in which they shared every burden rather than one person always trying to shield the other—might be the better path. He thought it over and answered with quiet seriousness.

“Okay. Starting tomorrow, please turn the air conditioner down a little. Just a tiny bit.”