Ning Xiaobei sat on a bench outside the emergency room, touching his head, carefully bandaged, and thought of the words: illusory and fleeting1梦幻泡影(Mènghuànpàoyǐng) : A Buddhist term meaning the transitory, dreamlike nature of life.
The last scene in this real world he could remember was saying goodbye to Chang Leyun before going to the bar with Fan Xia.
As for how he got injured or ended up in the hospital afterward, he remembered nothing.
He thought that maybe his consciousness had been caught at the boundary between two parallel worlds, the pull from both sides constantly tugging at him, which caused a large chunk of his memory to vanish.
“Officer, I really can’t remember. I don’t know if I blacked out from drinking too much or if it’s because of the injury.”
Ning Xiaobei pointed to his head, swollen and bruised from the blows.
No wonder it hurt so much in the dream. Someone had hit him twice with a glass bottle, his skull nearly exposed. Of course it would hurt.
The police officer in front of him was familiar. On the first day Fan Xia reunited with him, this was the same officer who had been on patrol with Fan Xia. His name seemed to be Officer Chen.
“Officer Chen, is Fan Xia okay?”
Just moments ago, he had watched Fan Xia, struggling on oxygen, being wheeled into the operating room, completely covered by a blue sheet, with bright red blood seeping through from underneath. It had looked very bad.
“He was stabbed twice. The wound locations were somewhat dangerous and caused severe bleeding… sigh…”
Officer Chen let out a long sigh and shoved the small notebook he had been writing the report in into the pocket of his police vest.
“The two of them are wanted criminals. We hadn’t been able to track them for a while, and I never expected them to end up on Bar Street.”
“Wanted criminals…”
Ning Xiaobei wanted to ask more, but the next second the world spun around him. His head felt like it was splitting in two, and he had to slump back onto the bench.
“Hey, patient, why are you running around? You just got stitched up, and you’re already acting so energetic? Officer, please wait until the patient’s condition stabilizes before questioning him, okay?”
A nurse came pushing a wheelchair, helping Ning Xiaobei onto it and speaking to the officer with a sharp tone.
Officer Chen realized he wasn’t going to get any useful information and took his leave.
“I’m fine, nurse. Really. Can you go check on the operating room for me?”
Ning Xiaobei said anxiously.
“Fine? You just got stitches and a simple dressing. You still need a CT scan and an MRI. Later, they’ll also issue a medical injury report for you.”
The nurse skillfully pushed the wheelchair toward the examination rooms. As she walked, she pulled something from her pocket and placed it in Ning Xiaobei’s palm.
“Here, this fell when we cut the other patient’s clothes open earlier. Too bad it broke. Since you’re his friend, I’ll give it to you.”
She lowered her head, sneaking a glance at Ning Xiaobei’s profile.
Even though his face was wrapped in bandages, it was clear he was a rare beauty. Perhaps due to blood loss, his complexion was ghostly pale, almost white, and the corridor lights cast the shadow of his thick eyelashes across his cheeks, making him look fragile and helpless.
Originally, she’d been in a foul mood after a busy night shift, but seeing a handsome patient seemed to lift it a little.
Ning Xiaobei held the broken white jade Guanyin in his hand, his palm trembling slightly.
He wiped the blood off the Guanyin’s face with his left fingers and rolled up the sleeve on his left arm with his right hand.
A string of sandalwood prayer beads appeared on his wrist.
The deep brown beads had a soft luster, a patina formed from years of handling. Even the string had loosened over time. They were clearly years old, nearly a part of the body itself, so he hadn’t even noticed them on his wrist until now.
Another artifact affected by the parallel world. No, make that two.
After the exams, the nurse wheeled Ning Xiaobei to the observation ward to rest.
He asked repeatedly about the injured officer, but the nurse just said he was still in critical care, and no one could go in.
Half-lying on the hospital bed, Ning Xiaobei watched the staff rush back and forth in the hallway, realizing just how hectic and colorful a nighttime emergency room could be.
In just half an hour, he saw a young couple fighting so badly they split their heads open, people choking on fish bones, drunks swinging wildly around the ER like they were doing drunken kung fu, and even a woman about to give birth being rushed in by her entire family while the husband sobbed uncontrollably, clutching the maternity bag.
A tiny emergency room held the full spectrum of human life.
Ning Xiaobei was too worried about Fan Xia to walk properly, his legs felt like jelly. The wheelchair he’d been in had already been taken away by the nurse, and now he had no means of getting around.
He struggled a couple of times, summoning every ounce of strength to get off the bed. Using both arms on the wooden handrail along the corridor, he inched toward the operating room.
At that moment, an elderly woman with a ruptured aneurysm had just been brought in. Her life hung by a thread, and all the ER doctors and nurses had rushed to her side, paying no attention to him.
Finally reaching the door of the operating room, half of Ning Xiaobei’s body was soaked in sweat, and the bandages on his head had begun to seep blood. He didn’t even notice, his mind was only on Fan Xia’s life.
Officer Chen had said earlier that, according to the surveillance footage, Fan Xia had been injured while saving him. Otherwise, with his abilities, he could’ve handled twice the attackers easily.
If anything happened to Fan Xia… Ning Xiaobei pressed both hands to his face. He couldn’t bear to imagine facing a world without him.
Moreover, he had a premonition: if Fan Xia really died in this real world, the dream world would probably collapse too. Everything, changing fate and saving Dad, would vanish into nothing, becoming empty talk.
He looked up at the screen above the operating room. It still read three red characters: ⟦ Surgery in Progress⟧. Sitting slumped on the bench, he breathed heavily. Those three words felt piercing, each one soaked in blood.
At that moment, the display went dark. With a whoosh sound, Fan Xia was pushed out from inside.
Ning Xiaobei tried to stand, but his legs felt like they were on a small boat rocking up and down. His eyes flickered like a movie reel — dark, then colorful, then static snow — before his legs gave out and he collapsed back onto the bench.
“Hey, handsome, why are you running around here again? Oh no, it’s bleeding again.”
The nurse had been searching the observation room and found him here.
“I’ll go back in a bit, just please check on him,” Ning Xiaobei waved to her. But the nurse was firm this time: he had to lie back down immediately.
At that moment, a young woman, windblown and dusty, rushed in. Seeing Fan Xia on the bed, she threw herself onto him, crying and shouting words that sounded like a foreign language.
She was beautiful, with fair skin and long black hair that shook with every sob.
Her grief was so intense it seemed like her heart might tear out. Large teardrops fell onto her hands like pearls strung on a broken thread. For the first time, Ning Xiaobei realized that saying tears like broken pearls wasn’t an exaggeration, it was reality.
“He even said he didn’t have a girlfriend… and then used Chang Leyun as a smoke screen,” Ning Xiaobei murmured.
So Fan Xia’s girlfriend was this stunning, affectionate person.
Ning Xiaobei knew he shouldn’t be thinking about trivial matters at a moment like this, but he couldn’t help letting his mind wander.
The nurse standing next to Fan Xia asked the girl if she was a family member. The girl nodded.
Ning Xiaobei felt his heart drop like a stone.
The doctor then explained to the girl that Fan Xia had been stabbed in the chest. Luckily, the wound missed his heart. The surgery had gone fairly smoothly, but he had lost a lot of blood and needed to go to the ICU for further observation and treatment. His final condition could only be determined after he woke up.
Hearing this, both the girl and Ning Xiaobei breathed a simultaneous sigh of relief.
But at the same time, they felt even more awkward.
The girl finally noticed another person standing there. Curiously, she cast a questioning glance at him, her large, shimmering eyes still glistening with tears.
Ning Xiaobei felt a mix of anger and embarrassment.
He felt like a clown, coming over all eager to guard Fan Xia, only to be replaced by the real family member.
So when the nurse who had been chasing after him reached out to guide him back to the ward, he no longer resisted and obediently followed her.
“Wait…”
The girl suddenly called out from behind Ning Xiaobei, “Are you Xiaobei gege?”
Her Shanghai-accented tone sounded a bit funny, and even the nurse helping Ning Xiaobei couldn’t help but laugh.
Ning Xiaobei slowly turned his head and realized that the girl hadn’t been speaking a foreign language at all. She was using the local dialect from Chongming Island.
“Ah, it really is Xiaobei gege!”
The girl smiled, and the tear that had been hanging at the corner of her eye slipped down with a swish.
“You… are…Nuxia?”
Ning Xiaobei asked uncertainly.
Fan Xia’s little sister…Fan Nuxia?
With a sudden jolt, his heart, which had just fallen, bounced back into place and began racing uncontrollably.
“Xiaobei gege, you’re hurt too… how reckless. Is the wound serious?”
“Still waiting for the injury assessment,” he replied.
Inside the observation ward, Fan Xia’s little sister sat across from Ning Xiaobei, anxiously watching him.
“When big brother’s colleague called me, I was so scared I felt like my soul had flown out. I didn’t dare tell my parents, so I asked my husband to drive straight to the city.”
She pulled out a handkerchief and wiped the tears at the corners of her eyes. “I just asked the doctor. We still can’t see him today; we have to wait until tomorrow. If he makes it through the danger period tonight, I can go in to see him tomorrow.”
As she spoke, she smiled a little embarrassedly. “Xiaobei gege, don’t call me Fan Nuxia anymore. That was my old name. After I started school, I changed it to Fan Baixue. Don’t use my old name in front of outsiders…”
Fan Jian was pretty lazy when it came to names. He named his son Fan Xia. For his daughter, he got creative and called her Fan Nuxia2Nuxia = Girl Xia, patting himself on the back and joking that Fan Xia’s son would one day be called Fan Xiaoxia3Xiaoxia = Little Xia.
Only the father-and-son in the family thought it sounded good. The rest of the family was completely speechless.
“How are your parents? I heard from Fan Xia that you’re married and pregnant?”
It was hard to imagine. She had been a little country girl that summer in third year of middle school, sniffling, wearing split-crotch pants, running after Fan Xia—now in the blink of an eye, she had grown up. Truly in the blink of an eye.
“They’re doing pretty well. Mom scrolls Douyin4Chinese TikTok app every day and even records videos. After meals, she goes to the river to dance. Dad fishes every day. He was already dark-skinned, and now he’s even darker from the sun…”
Fan Xia’s little sister talked rapidly, using words to hide her inner anxiety.
Before long, her husband Ah-Hua came in, saying that both their hospitalization procedures were completed.
“Xiaobei gege, we won’t disturb you any longer. You look tired,” Ah-Hua said quietly.
Seeing Ning Xiaobei forcing himself to respond despite looking worn out, Fan Baixue suddenly understood and quickly stood up.
“My husband will stay overnight outside the ICU today. I’ll come back in the morning to see you and bring some clean clothes. Xiaobei gege, you don’t mind using my brother’s things, do you?”
She had a key to Zhao Jingwen’s place and planned to grab some clothes for him.
“No problem. Thanks for helping,” he said.
Probably from blood loss, Ning Xiaobei felt extremely tired and couldn’t keep his eyes open.
Fan Baixue and her husband exchanged a glance and quietly left the room.
“Wait…”
Just as the two of them were about to step out the door, Ning Xiaobei called Fan Baixue back.
“Tomorrow, if you can get into the ICU, please help put this on his hand.”
As he spoke, Ning Xiaobei slid the Buddhist prayer beads off his arm.
He wasn’t a superstitious person. When he first entered the dream world, his immediate thought was that this was a parallel universe straight out of a sci-fi novel, not some karmic past-life nonsense.
But for Fan Xia, he was willing to believe, just this once.
“Ah, okay,” Fan Baixue said, taking the beads and stepping back.
“Wow, Xiaobei gege really gets along with my brother. He even gives him something so personal,” she said.
Fan Baixue was pregnant and had been mentally and physically exhausted for hours. She rubbed her lower back as she spoke to her husband, Ah-Hua.
Ah-Hua, though young, was steady and calm. He put an arm around his wife’s waist and nodded silently.
………………
The next day, Fan Xia got out of the danger period and was transferred to a regular ward, though for some reason he still hadn’t woken up.
Colleagues and superiors from the police station came to visit in waves. To avoid disturbing other patients, the hospital specially arranged a single room just for him. The station leadership made it clear that they would cover all of Fan Xia’s medical expenses, so the family shouldn’t worry about money and should give him the best treatment possible.
“Thank you for looking out for him. I’ve taught my son since he was young to serve the country loyally. It’s not just about being injured. For the country, giving your life is acceptable,” Fan Jian said proudly, shaking hands with the station leader.
“Uncle Fan, have a sip of water.”
After Xiao Hua and his wife went to see off the visitors, Ning Xiaobei quickly brought a cup of ginseng tea to Fan Jian.
“Ah, really sorry about this. Xiaobei, you’re hurt too, yet you’re still worrying so much about our Xiao Xia,” Fan Jian said, taking the cup with a wry smile.
Earlier, around strangers, he had to keep up appearances no matter how heavy his heart was. Only now, in front of his daughter, son-in-law, and Xiaobei, who was almost like a son to him, could he finally relax a little.
“Uncle, I’m fine, just some scrapes. The stitches will come out in a few days. Besides, Fan Xia got hurt saving me,” Ning Xiaobei said, touching the bandage on his head. The pain made his brow twitch, but he didn’t dare show it in front of Fan Jian and just endured it.
“Saving or not, he’s a people’s police officer. Protecting the public is his duty. And besides, you two grew up together, without you, could he have become a cop? He’d probably still be a small-time troublemaker. I remember before he transferred to Fourth Primary School, he was so mischievous that even being hung up for punishment didn’t scare him,” Fan Jian said.
Though aged, his eyes were still bright and sharp, his posture straight, and his voice crisp and firm.
When he smiled, there was still a trace of the roguish aura. No wonder so many girls had thrown themselves at him back in the day. That’s probably the so-called allure of a tough guy.
Ning Xiaobei couldn’t help but wonder if Fan Xia would look like that when he grew old. Well, that would be fine, at least he’d be healthy.
“Xiaoxia won’t wake up… what are we going to do? His mother is overseas and frantic. All because of this pandemic, she can’t even come back…” Fan Jian kept sighing. In the past few days, he had been scolded multiple times over video calls by his ex-wife and didn’t even want to open WeChat anymore.
Turning to look at his son lying on the bed, his thick brows furrowed deeply.
He felt ashamed. As a father, he hadn’t been responsible. After divorcing his wife years ago, he had left his son with his uncle and lived his carefree life. Later, he remarried Fan Baixue’s mother and settled down, but seeing his son now still filled him with guilt.
He wasn’t the type to openly express love or emotions, so he had tried to make up with money and property. Luckily, his son had never held a grudge and had always been dutiful.
In his eyes, this son had always been lively, spirited, like an energetic little rascal who couldn’t stop moving. Now, lying motionless in bed, he looked wilted. Fathers and sons share a heart; how could he not be pained?
If Fan Xia never woke up, it would be a tragedy of a white-haired man sending off a black-haired one.
“Xiaobei, Uncle is going out for some fresh air…”
Fan Jian stood up, secretly wiping the corner of his eye with the back of his hand. He had always presented himself as a tough guy, and though he was old, he refused to show weakness. He couldn’t lose face in front of Xiaobei.
Not long ago, the room had been full of people; now, in just a short while, only the two of them remained.
Ning Xiaobei pulled over a chair and sat at Fan Xia’s bedside, staring at his haggard face.
After days of unconsciousness, his jaw was covered in short stubble, and even his cheeks had sunken in. Was this still the Fan Xia from his memory, always full of life, shining like a little sun that lit up everyone around him?
“Fan Xia, wake up,” he whispered, holding his hand and calling his name over and over.
“As long as you wake up, I’ll do anything for you.”
“Fan Xia… Fan Xia…”
After a long while, the hospital room door quietly creaked open.
A cane was propped in first, followed by the half-hunched figure of an elderly man.
He lifted his head and took in the scene before him.
The early winter sun streamed in through the window, casting its warmth on the two not-so-young men. Their heads rested against each other, hands entwined, sleeping soundly — just like when they were kids.
“Ah…”
Zhao Jingwen let out a long sigh.
………………
Author’s Note:
Fan Xia’s little sister has grown up, haha. Fan Jian, don’t be polite. This is your son-in-law now.
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