PM Chapter 4

最佳契合 (Perfect Match) – 十九瑶

Chapter 4

“How many lies have you told?”

He An never imagined Zheng Feiluan would ask him that. He stared for a long time, replaying the motion of Zheng Feiluan’s mouth over and over before he finally managed to understand the blunt accusation behind the question.

“No… no, I didn’t lie!”

He shook his head desperately, grabbed Zheng Feiluan’s hand, and pressed it to his wrist. Beneath his pale skin, faint violet veins throbbed in a frantic, messy rhythm—his pulse, boiling wildly through his whole body, “Look—this is my… my heartbeat. It’s only been ten seconds, and it’s already this fast. That means… I really like you…”

Zheng Feiluan yanked his hand back and flicked it off like it was dirty, then shoved it into his trouser pocket right in front of He An, not bothering to hide the disgust in every gesture.

“Let me remind you of a basic biological fact,” he said, looming over him. “To ensure successful mating, pheromone attraction is always mutual. Even the trashiest soap operas don’t bother with this “painful one-sided devotion” nonsense anymore. You react, I don’t—doesn’t that tell you everything? So am I allowed to assume that this so-called perfect match is highly suspicious? Or better yet—let’s say it straight.”

He snatched the report from the table and shoved it right in He An’s face, “This test—did you just fake the whole damn thing?”

“No!” He An panicked, denying it loudly enough for his voice to crack, “Every single one of those numbers is real—nobody tampered with anything!”

But Zheng Feiluan didn’t believe a word, “I feel nothing for you. How do you explain that?”

He An fell silent.

He tilted his head back and looked up at his alpha, staying silent for a long time. Only after a while did he slowly lower his gaze. His hand trembled as he reached out and took the report—so close it still carried a faint smell of hospital disinfectant, “Feiluan… if you could feel even a little for me when you’re awake, your mate-seeking disorder… wouldn’t be triggered at all.”

Zheng Feiluan’s brows snapped together, “What is that supposed to mean?”

He An drew a deep breath and let it out slowly from his chest. His fingers brushed over the page, lingering on the printed 100%.

“You probably won’t believe this, but when you lose consciousness, you want me more than anyone else. It’s like… like once you have me, nothing else matters. The moment you see me, you become aroused; when you touch me, you tremble as if you can’t control yourself; and when we have sex, you’re wild—like a starving wolf. Your possessiveness is terrifying. There was one time you showed up while I happened to have a guest over, an underage beta. A grown alpha shouldn’t feel threatened by a kid, but you didn’t say a single word—you just slapped him across the face. I had to apologize to him over and over. But… once we were done, your temper would soften. You would be as clingy as a child in need of a parent’s embrace, begging me to rock you to sleep.”

He An gave a bitter smile, “You probably don’t remember any of that, do you? In your conscious mind, I don’t even exist.”

Zheng Feiluan said nothing, turning his head to stare out the window.

He An continued, “After that, I went to a bunch of hospitals and saw several doctors. I asked them—there are so many alphas in this world, so why is mine different? Why is it that even with such a high compatibility, he refuses to love me when he’s awake? I stand right in front of him—two, three meters away—sunlight on me, impossible to miss, and he still acts like I’m invisible. The doctors told me it’s because… your subconscious is rejecting me. It doesn’t want to admit it’s drawn to me.”

His voice began to shake. He grabbed his cup and downed more than half the hot chocolate like he was freezing, swallowing too fast and choking hard.

Zheng Feiluan watched him cough until he was done, showing no emotion.

He An paused for a bit to collect his breath and then continued, “The doctor told me that because your subconscious rejects me, your hypothalamus—or whatever part of the brain it is—starts secreting something that blocks the flow of your pheromones. It suppresses your emotions and your desire. But everyone needs an outlet. Normal couples live together, they hug, they kiss, and they balance each other’s pheromones. We don’t. And eventually, your body can’t take any more. You can no longer deal with it rationally. Your pheromones push you to come find me, to make love to me, until you get enough comfort to calm down.”

Once again, pheromones were to blame when his self-control crumbled.

Zheng Feiluan thought of the omega actor who had betrayed him, and his face grew even darker. Out of the corner of his eye, he glanced at He An. With his head bowed and his body quivering, the young man’s misery was plain to see. The fringe over his forehead trembled slightly, and the drink in his cup rippled in widening circles.

He An softly said, “I asked the doctor why an alpha would subconsciously reject me. The doctor said there are too few cases and too many possibilities. Maybe it’s my fault… maybe it’s yours… maybe it’s both of ours. If we want answers, the best thing would be to live together for a while. Once we really get to know each other, maybe we can untie that knot in your subconscious.”

Living together. Staying close. Becoming familiar. Untangling the knot. And then, eventually, loving each other—it all sounded so natural and beautiful.

But in reality, the success rate of that plan was alarmingly low.

Almost zero.

A year ago, after receiving counsel and support from the doctor, He An began combing through every case study he could find, hoping to find a means to “wake” Zheng Feiluan up. But as he looked into it more, the truth was more and more heartbreaking: mate-seeking disorder was very rarely seen, and only twelve pairs had been documented—and none of them ended happily.

Because all of the alphas refused to give their omegas anything.

Alphas were the more powerful half of a pair. They had unshakable pride and a will stronger than any omega. Once their subconscious mind had decided someone was repulsive or unfit, no amount of rational thought could change that decision. This meant that omegas were never given the opportunity to mend gaps, no matter how much they extended an olive branch.¹“Extend an olive branch” is an idiom for when someone wants to make up and stop fighting.

He An was the only one who was truly aware of what became of those discarded omegas… and the alphas they had to say goodbye to.

Heaven never gives out kindness for free. If it gives you a rare, enviable compatibility score, it will also give you a trap to fall into. It will be wrapped up with a bow, and something will be hidden in black and white. If it’s honey, you are happily tied up for life. If it’s poison, you rip each other apart and lose the only luck you’ll ever have.

He An did exactly that: he opened the gift without any kind of defense. He took the rose in his hand and unwrapped the ribbon, and then he watched his world fall apart around him.

Was he scared?

To be honest, not really.

He had already imagined many times all the different ways Zheng Feiluan could respond. Any pain that you go over again and again loses its sting, just like a piece of chewed gum that has lost its flavor. But he still couldn’t face it. Fear struck him as he stared into the intensely cold and distant eyes that had once burned with need and passion, now devoid of any sign of emotion.

He An was gentle by nature—he was never irritable or confrontational. He just wanted to be a housecat who lived in peace and didn’t worry about what might go wrong tomorrow.

Before, Cheng Xiu had been angry for him, spitting as he spent the whole afternoon talking about both good and bad things and telling him to be honest with Zheng Feiluan. But He An just curled up like a soft little thing hiding inside a shell, covering his eyes and lying to himself as he mumbled, “Not yet… Please, just give me a moment more. Give me a little more time to be with him.”

Because, like all other tragic alpha and omega relationships—his with Zheng Feiluan would fall apart once he revealed everything.

But… it still wasn’t enough.

He hadn’t loved him for long enough. He hadn’t given up hope enough. He was still trapped alone in this sinking pit—unable to forget the rain from the day they first met, the umbrella they shared, the few dozen meters they walked side by side… and the tiny, foolish hope that maybe—just maybe—they could’ve kept walking like that forever.

⋮

　　“We don’t need to live together.” Zheng Feiluan suddenly spoke, cutting through He An’s thoughts, “You don’t understand why my subconscious rejects you—but I do.”

He returned to his seat, laced his fingers under his chin, and fixed his gaze on He An. His expression was cool, arrogant:

“Mr. He, according to this report, your pheromones match mine one hundred percent. Sure, that’s an impressive mating advantage, but frankly, pheromones aren’t everything. Education, worldview, family background, social class… these matter far more than some chemical compatibility. When we consider all of it together, I think even you’ll agree that we’re not the perfect match. To be blunt, we are so far from even being a decent match.”

“The omega I want is passionate, bold, and ambitious. Someone who can be wild and versatile in bed, then independent and self-sufficient outside of it. Someone who can attend social events with me, speak well, move gracefully, and share real common ground. And obviously, you don’t fit a single one of those requirements. So my subconscious rejecting you is… pretty much expected.”

A total, merciless rejection—every word cutting straight to the bone—from the alpha who had been lost in his body just last night.

He An gripped his scarf hard, his palm slick with cold sweat. A chill crawled up the back of his neck, and the bite mark on his gland throbbed like it was being torn open again.

Of course. How could someone like him ever be worthy of the brilliant, dazzling Zheng Feiluan?

He was just…

Just an utterly ordinary omega.

Zheng Feiluan continued, “Instead of wasting time and energy on this cohabitation nonsense, I prefer another solution: cut off this messy, inappropriate relationship of ours. What do you think?”

He phrased it as a question, but the command inside it was absolute.

He An froze, voice trembling, “Cut it off… how?”

Zheng Feiluan replied, “As I understand it, mate-seeking disorder is basically a severe addiction. And weighing the pros and cons, I think the best treatment isn’t indulgence—it’s withdrawal. Step one is removing the addictive source. In other words, you. I need to erase every connection between us. Wipe it clean. Reset. Call it whatever you want. But we go back to the beginning, to when we didn’t know each other at all—no ties, no entanglement.”

Bound by the instinctive obedience carved into an omega’s nature, He An couldn’t tell him no.

He sat there in a daze, like a puppet with rusted joints, letting those cold, precise words pour into his ears.

“Mr. He, I understand your craving for an alpha. With a five-digit serial number starting with a nine… such terrible natural conditions… I’d guess you’ve never been in love. I’m the first one, aren’t I?”

Humiliated, He An still nodded.

Zheng Feiluan smiled lightly, “I’m honored.”

He spoke in a casual way, but his eyes didn’t show any pleasure. He didn’t even try to pretend he was impressed.

“I get it. Missing out on me means you’ll likely never meet another alpha who makes your heart race. But sadly, your pain isn’t my fault. I’m a person with free will. I have no obligation to sacrifice my own happiness just to make your life easier.”

“You just said we should live together—hug every day, kiss, and balance our pheromones. Assuming I’m getting this right… a marriage is what you truly mean.”

He laughed at that point, “Mr. He, let me tell you that there are way too many omegas who want to marry into the Zheng family. Isn’t it kind of silly to think you can get in just by depending on pheromones you were born with?”

He An dropped his head and said, “Yes, it’s… quite silly.”

He was unable to exhale as the words were stuck in his throat. He couldn’t get a word out. It felt like a needle was going through his fingertip. It kept pushing harder and harder until the pain got so bad that he finally let out a single drop of blood and a single word.

Something was quickly freezing inside him, starting from the farthest points of his arms and legs—first cold, then icy, until his blood completely stopped running. The frozen crystals broke up into a huge number of sharp arrows that all hit his chest at the same time and stabbed through his heart.

To his alpha, he was nothing but a scheming, conniving liar.

Even after hundreds of chews, the bitter taste of the piece of gum stayed.

Zheng Feiluan asked the café server for paper and a pen. He laid them flat on the table and began writing in strong, decisive strokes as he spoke:

“We’ll draft a withdrawal agreement, so we don’t have conflicts later. There are three main ties between you and me. First, I know where you live. Second, you carry my mark. Third, you’re carrying my child. We cut these ties one by one. Any objections?”

He An’s head snapped up—his face white as chalk.

Had he heard that wrong?

More customers had come in. The café was no longer quiet—ordering, chatting, the cash register ringing, the grinder buzzing. A cheerful folk song had reached its chorus. Outside the window, cars passed nonstop, horns occasionally honking in impatience. Pedestrians rushed by, their footsteps pattering past the glass…

Too noisy.
The noise drowned out Zheng Feiluan’s voice.

So He An told himself—He must have misheard.

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Translated and edited by janemoyu (08/19/25)

• 1
  “Extend an olive branch” is an idiom for when someone wants to make up and stop fighting.