PTCQT Chapter 19

Compared to Xie Baiyuan’s guilty conscience, Xu Ze was genuinely surprised and a little shy. “You still remember that time?!”

He hadn’t expected that after just one brief encounter, Shen Chun would actually remember it was him that day.

“We were in the same department, of course I remember,” Shen Chun said with a smile, glancing at the fruit in Xu Ze’s hand. “But there’s no need to thank me now just for passing on those mooncakes. That was so long ago.”

“Not that, I’m talking about what happened with Wang Pengcheng this time,” Xu Ze said. He knew in his heart that Shen Chun was helping him; otherwise, there’d be no reason for him to share his own experience with a planning proposal.

He’d been ostracized, bullied, and had his painstakingly prepared proposal stolen. He didn’t have the strength to fight back. The achievements he once took pride in no longer seemed impressive in the eyes of those around him. Meanwhile, things he didn’t know, piano, violin, Go, guzheng, others seemed to excel at effortlessly. His growing sense of inferiority made it hard to hold his head up in front of these favored sons of heaven.

In that kind of darkness, no one would bother to lend a hand, no one except Shen Chun, who had noticed his predicament and reached out to help. Xu Ze felt deeply grateful.

“You mean that?” Shen Chun chuckled. “I wasn’t really helping you, I just couldn’t stand him constantly badmouthing me. That’s all.”

“And besides, when you stood up and called him out, you helped me too. So we’re even.”

He had only gone up against one person, not with the intention of taking on another. The reason he stepped in was simply because it was convenient, and to keep the original gears from meshing back together. There was no need to accept such gratitude for something so casual.

“But…” Xu Ze hesitated. Though Shen Chun’s words left him feeling a little disappointed, his gratitude was sincere. “Still, thank you. The gift isn’t anything expensive, please accept it.”

The bag of fruit was filled with a wide variety, blueberries and other pricey kinds. Xu Ze had clearly put a lot of thought into it. If they were just ordinary male friends, sharing a piece or two of fruit wouldn’t mean much. But when there might be other unspoken boundaries between them, accepting a gift like this could easily become inappropriate.

“I can’t accept a reward for doing nothing,” Shen Chun said, looking at Xu Ze and politely refusing.

“If you don’t like fruit…” Xu Ze assumed he was looking down on the gift and was just about to say he could get something else instead, when Shen Chun added, “I do like fruit. But if I casually accept gifts from someone else, my partner will get jealous.”

If it were any other man, he probably wouldn’t have cared so much. But Xu Ze liked men himself, and that made certain things harder to say out loud. “Sorry about that,” he murmured.

He had been petty, he could see now that it really wasn’t appropriate.

“It’s alright. See you around,” Shen Chun said with a smile.

Xu Ze nodded and left with the fruit in hand. Once the door closed, Shen Chun lowered his arm and sat back in his original spot, clearly intending to return to his reading. When Shen Chun had refused the gift earlier, Xie Baiyuan had felt a brief sense of relief, but now, that feeling subtly tensed again.

“I didn’t know it was Xu Ze who sent the mooncakes,” he said.

If he had known, he definitely would have returned them.

“Oh?” Shen Chun rested his head on his hand, holding a pen between his fingers as he looked at Xie Baiyuan. His eyes curved slightly with a smile. “I didn’t say anything. Why are you so nervous, President?”

Xie Baiyuan walked over and sat down beside Shen Chun. “You don’t know, Xu Ze likes men too.”

“Mhm, and then…?” Shen Chun prompted calmly.

Xie Baiyuan knew he shouldn’t be jealous, but he couldn’t help the twinge of sourness in his heart. “I’m not saying you can’t be friends with other people… I just don’t want you getting too close to Xu Ze.”

The person in front of him was so outstanding, even on the forums, there were plenty of posts where bottoms openly offered themselves to Shen Chun, even if framed as jokes. Still, it made Xie Baiyuan painfully aware of just how many people were eyeing Shen Chun with desire.

It wouldn’t matter if Xu Ze were straight, but the fact was, he liked men. If they stayed too close for too long, it wouldn’t be impossible for him to develop feelings for Shen Chun.

[Host, the main gong seems like he’s getting jealous over the main shou!] 521 exclaimed in surprise.

[Sweetie, be more confident, take out the “seems like.”] Shen Chun replied with a smile.

[This is amazing!] the newly appointed system let out an awestruck gasp, clearly unaccustomed to such developments.

Shen Chun figured that 521 might still find such little things amazing for now, but given time, it would grow used to them, and might even laugh at its current self someday. [Hmm, truly amazing.]

“President, are you afraid I’ll fall for Xu Ze?” Shen Chun asked deliberately.

“I’m afraid…” Xie Baiyuan started, but the words got stuck in his throat. The way he looked now, it was obvious, whether he admitted it or not, he was acting jealous. Even if he called it “being cautious” it was way too early to be this cautious.

“Oh, I see now.” Shen Chun let out a knowing laugh. “President, that apple in Xu Ze’s bag just now looked so fresh. Big and red, must be really sweet…”

“I’ll buy them for you,” Xie Baiyuan blurted out.

“The blueberries…”

“Buy too.”

“Strawberries.”

“Buy.”

“President, you really are generous with money,” Shen Chun said with a teasing smile.

Xie Baiyuan looked at him deeply, then took his hand and said seriously, “I’m willing to give you everything, just don’t go attracting anyone else.”

Shen Chun had once read a line, ‘Her love had fallen into the dust, so humble that she still silently prayed for a little response.’¹This expresses a love so self-effacing that the person loses their pride and dignity, loving from a place of deep vulnerability. From Eileen Chang (張愛玲) is a famous 20th-century Chinese writer known for her poetic and often melancholic prose.

Shen Chun couldn’t personally relate to that kind of love, but looking at Xie Baiyuan, he didn’t find it unpleasant. To him, truly loving someone seemed like the most beautiful thing in the world.

“President, does buying me apples make you happy?” Shen Chun asked.

Xie Baiyuan nodded instinctively. “Of course.”

He wished he could buy ten baskets full, to block the way for anyone else who might want to give fruit.

“President, I won’t attract anyone else, I only want you,” Shen Chun said, leaning in to kiss his lips with a smile.

Xie Baiyuan’s breath hitched slightly, but his heart burned so fiercely that a thin sweat broke out on his back. He really, truly liked Shen Chun—liked him very, very much.

“But I have a question,” Shen Chun said as he moved back to his original seat, looking at Xie Baiyuan.

“Go ahead,” Xie Baiyuan replied.

“When did I ever attract anyone else?” Shen Chun tapped his fingers lightly on the table.

He always behaved properly, at most casually helping others out, there was nothing intentional about him flirting with anyone. Xie Baiyuan was well aware of this, yet Shen Chun still seemed to attract attention wherever he went.

“President, do you think I’m a playboy?” Shen Chun asked.

Xie Baiyuan instinctively denied it. “…No.”

“You hesitated,” Shen Chun said, narrowing his eyes slightly. “Was that why you deliberately kept your distance from me at first?”

Hit right on the mark, Xie Baiyuan was left speechless and couldn’t argue.

He wasn’t good at lying to begin with, and now that his little flaw was caught, he had no way out. “That was just at the very beginning.”

“I might look a bit flirtatious, but my appearance is a gift from my parents. President, how can you judge me by my looks?” Shen Chun asked calmly.

“Sorry, it won’t happen again,” Xie Baiyuan apologized instinctively.

Shen Chun raised an eyebrow in surprise. “There’s a next time?!”

“No, no, no next time,” Xie Baiyuan hurriedly said. “I’ll never judge anyone by their looks again.”

Actually, he vaguely felt it wasn’t just about appearance, he had seen others whose looks were on par with Shen Chun’s before. It was Shen Chun’s unique temperament and way of doing things that set him apart.

“Actually, President, you’re not entirely right. Sometimes, you do have to judge by looks,” Shen Chun said, his fingers sliding along their joined hands and slipping into Xie Baiyuan’s sleeve, slowly stroking his wrist. “Otherwise, how else do you explain being so utterly captivated?”

Xie Baiyuan looked into his eyes and felt that the phrase utterly captivated was sometimes just a little too perfectly fitting.

Living in the same dorm had its pros and cons. The good part was being able to see your lover anytime, without worrying about anyone else eyeing him. The downside was that time could easily get wasted, like when Xie Baiyuan planned to finish his calculus problems in the afternoon but ended up delaying until evening, only to find a fresh, vivid bite mark on his wrist.

Though it could be hidden under a sleeve, it was still close enough to notice with just a casual glance.

As Xie Baiyuan worked on his problems, his mind kept drifting back to that spot, and he remembered what Shen Chun had said: “If there’s no apple, just let President satisfy my cravings first.”

That faint, teasing smile looked every bit like a fox spirit come to life.

“President, there are actually the words ‘fox spirit’ in your calculus problems?” Shen Chun appeared suddenly at his side, bending down to peek at the paper with a mischievous grin.

Xie Baiyuan snapped back to reality, nearly jumping out of his chair. Instinctively, he tried to cover the part where he’d made a mistake and looked at Shen Chun awkwardly. “N-No, there’s not.”

But his ears were burning bright red.

Shen Chun’s gaze swept over Xie Baiyuan’s ears, almost bleeding red, and he chuckled softly. “President, you’re not focusing on your problems, thinking about fox spirits while doing calculus? Could it be that…”

Xie Baiyuan’s heart skipped a beat before Shen Chun continued, “You want to watch that Fengshen TV series, don’t you? President, finish today’s work today. If you want to watch the show, you can do it after your homework’s done. No rush.”

Xie Baiyuan felt a bit relieved and nodded. “Alright, I got it.”

Xie Baiyuan calmed down and continued working on his problems. Shen Chun passed by him leisurely and said, “If I really were a fox spirit, I’d have already skinned and devoured the President, how could I just leave him looking so good like this?”

He turned and headed to the bathroom, leaving Xie Baiyuan’s thoughts, which had just settled, once again scrambled like a mess of tangled noodles.

The author has something to say:

Xie Baiyuan: Can we really blame King Zhou²King Zhou (紂王) was the notoriously cruel last ruler of the Shang dynasty in Chinese history and mythology, often blamed for all sorts of chaos and disasters. for this?

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  This expresses a love so self-effacing that the person loses their pride and dignity, loving from a place of deep vulnerability. From Eileen Chang (張愛玲) is a famous 20th-century Chinese writer known for her poetic and often melancholic prose.
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  King Zhou (紂王) was the notoriously cruel last ruler of the Shang dynasty in Chinese history and mythology, often blamed for all sorts of chaos and disasters.