EOD Chapter22

“Let me carry you to take a bath now, and I’ll apply the medicine for you after that, okay?” Zhou Zefeng tried to reason with Lu Zhao, but Lu Zhao still shook his head.

Lu Zhao’s mind was currently a chaotic mess, and he was physically and mentally exhausted. He just wanted to lie down quietly for a while, but even he didn’t expect that he would actually fall asleep while lying there.

Discovering that Lu Zhao had fallen asleep, Zhou Zefeng gently carried him to the bathroom, where the two of them took a bath together. It was only when they returned to the bedroom that he realized the entire bed was a complete mess and unusable, so Zhou Zefeng carried Lu Zhao to the study next door instead.

When it was time to apply the medicine, Zhou Zefeng finally saw how shocking and distressing the large area between Lu Zhao’s legs looked.

He squeezed out the ointment and rubbed it onto the wound as softly and gently as possible, but it still caused Lu Zhao to feel the pain even in his sleep. With an unconscious kick, Lu Zhao sent Zhou Zefeng tumbling straight off the bed. Resigned to his fate, Zhou Zefeng climbed back up and continued applying the ointment for him.

By the time he finally finished, it was already one in the morning. Zhou Zefeng covered Lu Zhao with the blanket and went to the adjacent room.

He stripped off the dirty, messy sheets and quilt covers, threw them into the washing machine, and found new ones from the wardrobe to replace them. The camera propped up on the side had long since run out of battery and shut down. Zhou Zefeng had originally packed away the camera and tripod and placed them on the desk, but after a moment of thought, he took the camera’s memory card out and put it into his pocket instead.

After finishing the chores, Zhou Zefeng intended to carry Lu Zhao back over to sleep but found that Lu Zhao was sleeping very soundly in the study.

Zhou Zefeng stood at the head of the bed. The warm light from the bedside lamp enveloped Lu Zhao, who was dressed in pure cotton loungewear, in a soft glow. Zhou Zefeng looked down, staring at Lu Zhao’s cheek, which was puffed up from being squished against the pillow, and it took an immense amount of willpower to resist the urge to poke it.

Standing in the blind spot where the light from the lamp couldn’t reach, Zhou Zefeng’s face was cast in deep shadow. If Lu Zhao were to open his eyes at this moment, he would see a Zhou Zefeng completely different from usual.

He stared at Lu Zhao’s lips, but after a long while, he averted his gaze as if trying to escape.

Zhou Zefeng squatted down to look at Lu Zhao’s face; a face that, although handsome and delicate, was not feminine at all.

Lu Zhao is a man; this was a dull alarm bell striking Zhou Zefeng’s heart, yet it was deafening, making it impossible for him to continue acting like a train driver ignoring a derailment.

Zhou Zefeng tucked in Lu Zhao’s blanket, turned off the bedside lamp, and gently closed the door.

In the end, Zhou Zefeng lay on the bed in the master bedroom of Lu Zhao’s home, his mind flooded with a chaotic mess of thoughts, tossing and turning, unable to fall asleep no matter what.

Is it normal to feel desire for a man?

Zhou Zefeng typed this line into a search engine but could not find any constructive answers.

For some reason, he remembered what Lu Zhao had said.

“If you want to hug, just hug. What’s so abnormal about that?”

Every behavior in the world could find its own logic and operate in an orderly fashion. If everything else was normal, then the only abnormal thing was Zhou Zefeng himself.

He couldn’t even tell if it was love, carnal desire, or simply novel curiosity. He only knew that he just wanted to see him every day; even if it was at the hospital, just a single consultation, just swimming together, browsing the supermarket, eating hot pot, taking walks, and many other things they hadn’t tried yet.

Zhou Zefeng didn’t know if this was what people called love.

Plucking up his courage, Zhou Zefeng found his mother’s WeChat account and sent her a voice message.

“Mom, are you asleep?” Zhou Zefeng’s voice sounded exceptionally deep in the quiet night. “I think I’ve fallen for a guy. Will you be angry?”

Zhou Zefeng knew his mother definitely wouldn’t reply this late, so he turned off his phone, deciding to completely empty his mind.

He couldn’t figure it out, nor did he want to think about it anymore. After tossing and turning for a long time, Zhou Zefeng finally fell into a deep sleep.

The next day, Lu Zhao was awoken by pain. The reason was that, while half-awake, his hand had restlessly picked at the wound between his legs, causing the area that had finally managed to scab over a little to instantly revert right back to square one overnight.

Moreover, it was only when he lifted the blanket that he noticed this wasn’t his own room.

Lu Zhao went downstairs and discovered he wasn’t the only one in the house. When Lu Zhao walked into the kitchen, Zhou Zefeng had just finished frying two eggs. Seeing that he was awake, Zhou Zefeng said, “Go wash your hands and come eat.”

“You slept here last night?” Lu Zhao took a sip of porridge.

Zhou Zefeng nodded, picking up a quail egg and starting to peel it. “It was too late yesterday, and I saw you were asleep, so I didn’t ask you. Do you mind?”

“I don’t mind. It’s not like there’s a next time anyway.” Lu Zhao said casually, biting off half of a poached egg in one mouthful.

Zhou Zefeng’s hand froze. He recognized every single word Lu Zhao said, but when put together, he couldn’t understand them. “What do you mean ‘no next time’?”

“It means that after we finish this meal, we shouldn’t see each other again.”

“Why?” Zhou Zefeng was blindsided by this sudden announcement. He placed the peeled quail egg back onto the plate. “Didn’t you say that if both you and I were satisfied, we could…”

“I’m not satisfied.”

“But I’m very satisfied.” Zhou Zefeng said through gritted teeth.

Lu Zhao raised his eyes to look at Zhou Zefeng. “I remember you said, ‘It depends on you’.”

Zhou Zefeng clenched his hands into fists, staring at Lu Zhao with an interrogating gaze as if trying to burn a hole through him. “Is it because of what happened yesterday? I didn’t control myself well and broke your rules. I promise I won’t do it in the future…”

“Yes, but not entirely either.” Lu Zhao finished his porridge, wiped his mouth with a tissue, and met Zhou Zefeng’s gaze, speaking with a serious expression, “It’s because of yesterday that I truly realized you and I share the same role preference.”

Zhou Zefeng showed a look of confusion. Lu Zhao sighed, continuing without batting an eye, “Do you really insist on me spelling it out? I wanted to screw you from the very beginning. Don’t tell me you didn’t know.”

“I, of course I didn’t know.” Zhou Zefeng was dumbfounded, his entire being plunged into a state of utter confusion. Immediately after, a point of doubt occurred to him. “But you’re shorter than me.”

“Are you discriminating based on height? Don’t treat a shorter Top like he’s not a Top. Besides, I’m 183 cm, which isn’t that much shorter than you, okay?” Lu Zhao frowned, his tone unfriendly. After a brief pause, he seemed to steady himself and spoke with calm analysis, “But that’s not the main issue anyway. Didn’t you say you were straight? Then explain what you did yesterday.”

Zhou Zefeng froze. Caught completely off guard by the interrogation, especially regarding something he hadn’t even figured out himself yet, he could only say in self-abandonment, “I don’t know either. Maybe I’m not that straight after all.”

“Fine. Assuming you were to have sex with me right now, would you be the one on top or the one on the bottom?”

Zhou Zefeng’s face instantly flushed red. He couldn’t control himself from imagining that scenario. Forcing himself to look composed, he said, “Top.”

Lu Zhao crossed his arms over the dining table, leaning a bit closer to Zhou Zefeng with a half-smile. “What a coincidence. So am I.”

Zhou Zefeng understood what that meant, and he was deeply shaken by it. However, he quickly caught onto something that felt off. “Why are we bringing up s*x? Aren’t we in a Dom/Sub relationship? It’s just simple org@sm control. If you’re afraid that I’ll push you around again, you can just tie my hands and feet up from now on…”

Lu Zhao shook his head, cutting him off. “I can’t do that.”

“Why can’t you? Didn’t you tie me up before?”

“I mean, I can’t manage not to have s*x with you.” Lu Zhao uttered these words of desire with an incredibly cold and detached face, making it seem inexplicably er0tic. Staring at Zhou Zefeng’s face, he said seriously, “Seeing you being controlled makes it impossible for me to hold back. That’s why yesterday’s accident happened. Do you understand?”

Zhou Zefeng was stunned. Lu Zhao continued, “I don’t like losing control, so I’m stepping back now before things go further. You don’t need to worry about whether you’re into guys or not; honestly, sexuality is fluid. Just treat all of this as a one-time accident. You’re still straight, I’m still gay, and we’ll just move on separately.”

“An accident?” Zhou Zefeng let out a mocking laugh. “You’re summarizing everything with a casual word like ‘accident’?”

“Let’s just part on good terms. What else do you want? I don’t owe you anything, do I?”

Zhou Zefeng stood up, walked around the table to stand right in front of Lu Zhao, and looked down at him with a scrutinizing gaze. “What do I want?”

Lu Zhao stood up as well, trying to reason with him. “This was just a partnership. There’s no need to—”

Before Lu Zhao could even finish his sentence, Zhou Zefeng suddenly leaned down and captured his lips. Zhou Zefeng wrapped his arm around Lu Zhao’s waist, pulling him close against himself, while lowering his head to deepen a kiss that carried a heavy sense of resentment and retaliation.

Zhou Zefeng’s way of kissing was utterly domineering, leaving no room for a person to breathe. He captured Lu Zhao’s lower lip, biting and chewing it, before thrusting his tongue straight inside to completely scramble Lu Zhao’s nerves. Lu Zhao forgot to struggle and quickly reclaimed the initiative; while licking and kissing Zhou Zefeng back, he even bit a small gash into his lip.

“Hiss…” Feeling a sharp pain in his lip, Zhou Zefeng let go of him and touched it. Lu Zhao had bitten him until he bled.

Lu Zhao was panting, yet his perfectly composed and capable demeanor made Zhou Zefeng’s teeth itch with resentment. Thus, he stepped forward to press against Lu Zhao and kissed him again. Both of them kissed until they were breathless, nearly losing control of themselves. After an unknown amount of time, Zhou Zefeng finally released Lu Zhao. He forcefully rubbed Lu Zhao’s reddened lips with his thumb and said in a low voice, “Whether there’s a need or not isn’t for you to decide.”

Lu Zhao’s mouth also had a small cut on it now, making his lips look even redder. He smiled faintly and said, “If you have the ability, then make me a Bottom for the sake of love. Otherwise, cut the crap.”

Zhou Zefeng didn’t reply. He gave Lu Zhao a deep, lingering look, and finally picked up his jacket, leaving without once looking back.

Left alone in the empty house, Lu Zhao was reminded of the last time Zhou Zefeng had left; when he had ended up finishing an entire plate of braised pork by himself. This time, however, the quail eggs Zhou Zefeng had peeled were still left on the dining table.

He could tell that Zhou Zefeng had peeled those quail eggs for him. When the first one was done, Zhou Zefeng had originally intended to place it into his bowl, but since he had chosen that exact moment to spoil the mood by proposing they never meet again, Zhou Zefeng had settled for putting it back onto the plate instead. Even during their confrontation, Zhou Zefeng had still finished peeling all three quail eggs, yet he hadn’t eaten a single one himself.

Lu Zhao stuffed all three quail eggs into his mouth at once. Turning his head, he then saw the full bowl of red pomelo on the coffee table, which had only been touched for a piece or two the night before, still sitting there completely intact.

Lu Zhao ate all of the pomelo as well. He discovered that he actually liked eating pomelo too, as long as there was someone to peel it for him.

However, Lu Zhao thought to himself, there probably wouldn’t be anyone else who would cook a plate of braised pork or peel a pomelo and quail eggs for him ever again.

He didn’t have many merits; the only thing he was truly good at was screwing up a relationship, and nothing else.