DIHBSG chapter 27

For some reason, after the river funds embezzlement case ended, Song Jian had the strange feeling that the story had reached its grand finale.

With a book covering his face, he lay on top of the Tiancha Division wall basking in the sun. Just as he was about to drift off to sleep, something suddenly landed on his neck.

Song Jian jolted awake. Reaching up to touch it, he found it was a fallen leaf.

He held up the leaf and looked at it for a while, then slowly thought, Oh… autumn’s here.

A lonely sense of melancholy rose in Song Jian’s heart. Spreading his arms wide, he called out,

“Yan Lili——”

“It’s—getting—cold——”

“I want hot pot—with meat——”

“Can’t do that, Lord Song.”

A reply suddenly came from beside his ear, but it wasn’t Yan Lili’s voice.

Song Jian looked up from the tree branch.

Chang Ying was climbing over the wall from outside. Sitting cross-legged beside him, he said, “The Ning River flood has just subsided. His Majesty has just issued an edict ordering everyone in the palace to observe a three-day fast, so starting today, the Tiancha Division will only have vegetarian meals.”

Song Jian: “?”

Huh?

Chang Ying said, “Are you hungry, my lord? I have a pear.”

As he spoke, he pulled a pear from inside his clothes and handed it over.

“Just picked it.”

It only took Song Jian three seconds to accept that he’d be eating vegetarian meals for the next few days.

It’s fine. It should be this way. Pears are delicious too.

Besides, it was only three days of vegetarian food. Compared to the suffering of the people along the Ning River, he was already very fortunate.

Song Jian took two crunchy bites of the pear. Just as he was about to ask how long they would be eating vegetarian meals, he heard a young eunuch arrive outside the Tiancha Division with a message.

It was Xiao Wuzi.

With a smile, Xiao Wuzi bowed and said, “Starting tomorrow, His Majesty will be going to Fuhui Temple for half a month of meditation, praying for the people of Changning along the way. Lord Song, His Majesty has instructed that you accompany him.”

Song Jian: “…”

“…”

Ha.

See? Even if the story had reached its grand finale, what did that have to do with overworked 007¹“007” is a Chinese internet slang term referring to an extreme work schedule of 12:00 a.m. to 12:00 a.m., seven days a week—essentially working around the clock with no days off. workhorses like them? They were just NPCs making up this world!!

The news that the Son of Heaven would soon be going to meditate and pray spread throughout the capital. Deeply moved, officials and commoners alike also began voluntarily observing a three-day fast.

Only Song Jian was special. He had to follow Xiao Yinghuai to the temple and observe half a month of fasting.

Song Jian couldn’t understand it. How had this “good thing” fallen into his lap? To show sincerity, shouldn’t the emperor normally bring the empress? Why bring him?!

Even if there wasn’t an empress, then… then Gong Defu could’ve gone.

Meanwhile, Gong Defu sneezed loudly.

Xiao Yinghuai lifted his eyes toward him and said, “It’s getting cold. Take care of yourself.”

Deeply moved by the emperor’s concern, Gong Defu wiped away his tears and said, “Thank you for Your Majesty’s concern. With just these words from Your Majesty, this old servant could die without regrets.”

Xiao Yinghuai said, “I care because I want you to live a few more years. If you die, who will work for me?”

Knowing that the emperor was soft-hearted despite his sharp tongue, Gong Defu burst into tears again.

After crying, he suddenly remembered something and said, “Your Majesty, perhaps you should still take this old servant along. Fuhui Temple can’t compare to the palace. Other people are all clumsy. If they fail to serve Your Majesty properly, what then…”

Xiao Yinghuai replied, “I’m going there to meditate, not to enjoy myself. Why would I need so many attendants?”

Gong Defu: “Wuwuwu…”

Xiao Yinghuai frowned slightly.

Gong Defu: “Boo-hoo…”

“Now that you have Lord Song, you don’t want this old servant anymore…”

Xiao Yinghuai: “…”

He said impatiently, “Cry again?”

Gong Defu immediately stopped.

Meanwhile, at the Tiancha Division, Song Jian was busily packing his things.

Storybooks, pack.

Chang Ying said, “My lord, Fuhui Temple has Buddhist scriptures. Storybooks aren’t allowed.”

Without saying a word, Song Jian threw them back out.

A rattle drum, pack.

Chang Ying said, “My lord, Fuhui Temple has wooden fish. They’re basically the same.”

Song Jian looked at him resentfully.

Chang Ying looked away. “0v0”

Song Jian: “Look at me! I refuse to believe your eyes are completely empty!”

Chang Ying immediately fled.

Two seconds later, Chang Ying appeared hanging upside down outside the window.

“My lord, the Grand Princess is here.”

With a heart full of sorrow, Song Jian went to open the door, only to find Xiao Yongning and Danluo carrying a huge pile of things.

“I heard you’re going to Fuhui Temple with my imperial brother for meditation, so I had my little kitchen prepare some pastries for you to take along.”

As she spoke, Xiao Yongning stuffed several enormous oil-paper packages into his arms.

“Don’t worry. I specifically told the kitchen about it. I checked all the ingredients myself—they’re all fine to eat during the fasting period.”

Song Jian’s eyes immediately turned into fried-egg eyes again from being so touched.

“Xiao Ba…”

Xiao Yongning patted him.

“Don’t get emotional yet. There’s more.”

Danluo handed him another bundle.

Xiao Yongning said, “These are some winter clothes I had made for you. Fuhui Temple is up on Mount Yue, much colder than the capital. Don’t get sick, or we won’t be able to go eat delicious food together.”

Song Jian nodded.

“Mm!”

After thinking for a moment, Xiao Yongning added, “Originally I also wanted to bring you some storybooks to pass the time, but it wouldn’t be appropriate, so I gave up.”

Song Jian was already deeply moved. Taking the things, he said, “When I get back, I’ll treat you to food all over the capital!”

Xiao Yongning held out her hand, and Song Jian slapped it in agreement.

The next day, the magnificent imperial procession set off.

Quite a few people accompanied the procession. At a glance, the crowd was enormous, and even several close ministers came along.

However, all these people were only accompanying the emperor for the sacrificial rites and prayers. They would leave the same day. Apart from the Imperial Guards stationed outside Fuhui Temple and the Tiancha Division shadow guards waiting in hidden locations, only Song Jian would remain by the emperor’s side throughout the fasting period.

Song Jian had lost all strength and means of resistance.

Looking on the bright side, didn’t this count as imperial favor?

Haha, it’s fine, it’s fine.

Xiao Wuzi couldn’t help whispering to Gong Defu, “Master, why does Lord Song look so dejected?”

Gong Defu wiped away his tears.

“Being able to accompany His Majesty personally during meditation and fasting—he must be overwhelmed with emotion.”

Xiao Wuzi also wiped away his tears.

“That makes sense.”

The Heaven Worship Ceremony was held atop Mount Yue. The abbot of Fuhui Temple, Wuwei, had long been waiting at the entrance with dozens of monks and novice monks from the temple.

“Wuwei greets Your Majesty.”

Xiao Yinghuai stepped forward.

“Master Wuwei, there’s no need for such formalities.”

Wuwei didn’t stand on ceremony either. Rising to his feet, he walked to the emperor’s side.

Song Jian observed him carefully for a while and realized the old man had kind features and seemed to radiate a Buddhist aura. Especially his unusually large earlobes. Looking at him like this, he really resembled the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas seated in temple halls.

Perhaps because he had been staring too intently, Wuwei looked back at him. Then, smiling knowingly, he shifted his gaze away and asked, “Has Your Majesty encountered some confusion recently?”

Song Jian: “（。· _ · 。）”

Why are you looking at me like that?

From Fuhui Temple to the summit of Mount Yue had to be traveled on foot, over a thousand stone steps. Following behind, Song Jian’s legs went weak and his eyes lost their spirit. Looking up again, he saw his leader and the Buddha-like old man chatting happily, neither blushing nor even breathing hard.

“…”

Way to embarrass us college students.

By the time they reached the summit, it was the auspicious hour. The emperor donned his ceremonial crown, offered sacrifices, welcomed the gods, and prayed for favorable weather, peace, and prosperity throughout the realm.

Song Jian couldn’t understand any of it, but he loved lively occasions, so he enthusiastically followed along for the entire grand sacrificial ceremony.

Xiao Wuzi couldn’t help asking Gong Defu again, “Master, why is Lord Song so happy?”

Gong Defu wiped away his tears ×2.

“Being able to accompany His Majesty personally during meditation and fasting—he must be overwhelmed with emotion.”

Xiao Wuzi pondered for a moment.

“…?”

Hadn’t he heard that before?

After the ceremony, the imperial procession began descended the mountain. Song Jian still hadn’t recovered from all the excitement. He happily followed the group, but after only two steps, the man grabbed him by the back of his collar and pulled him back.

Song Jian bent over like a cat.

Turning around: “??”

Wuwei wore that inscrutable smile again.

“Your Majesty, Lord Song, this way.”

Looking at the vast, silent mountain and the tranquil, solemn temple, Song Jian swore in despair that he would never give anyone a pleasant expression ever again.

The meditation room had already been cleaned up. Carrying his little cloth bag, Song Jian followed the man inside.

Step by step.

Bang.

Song Jian walked straight into a wall.

No, not a wall.

He looked up.

“QnQ.”

“Your Majesty, why did you stop walking?”

Xiao Yinghuai glanced down at him.

“If I took another step, where exactly would I be walking?”

Song Jian looked.

They had reached the bed. One more step and they’d be sleeping together on the spot.

He hurriedly took a step back and obediently said, “Then this subordinate will help Your Majesty put your things away.”

Xiao Yinghuai didn’t say anything, a faint glint lingering in his eyes.

Song Jian busied himself around the meditation room, secretly glancing behind him from the corner of his eye.

The man had already changed out of his elaborate imperial robes into a simple blue-white robe. Tall and straight, with an elegant neck, he no longer carried the oppressive aura he had in the palace.

Even so, Song Jian still felt a chill somewhere.

Around his butt, to be exact.

After hastily tidying things up, Song Jian cupped his hands and said goodbye.

“Your Majesty, this subordinate will return to his room now. If you need anything, just call for me.”

Whether I hear it or not is another matter.

Adjusting his little cloth bag on his shoulder, he turned to leave.

The man was seated at the table reading Buddhist scriptures. Without even looking up, he merely asked,

“Your room?”

Song Jian stopped.

“Mm-hmm!”

Xiao Yinghuai said, “Did Master Wuwei not tell you there’s only this one meditation room?”

A huge question mark appeared over Song Jian’s head.

Xiao Yinghuai continued, “Or has Lord Song forgotten his own identity?”

Damn.

He wasn’t going to have to share a room with his boss for all fifteen days, was he?!

Xiao Yinghuai’s slender fingers turned another page of the scripture.

“See the low desk beside you?”

Song Jian looked over.

He saw it. So what? Wasn’t that where miscellaneous things were kept?

Xiao Yinghuai said, “I had it specially prepared for you. During these days, you’ll copy Buddhist scriptures beside me.”

Song Jian: “…”

Why—Why——

As if hearing his thoughts, the man said, “I think Lord Song is careless, impetuous, and impatient. You would benefit greatly from meditating quietly in a temple. What do you think, Lord Song?”

Song Jian’s mind went through eight hundred twists and turns, but he still couldn’t think of an answer.

Walking over miserably, he plopped down onto the meditation cushion beside the man.

Xiao Yinghuai tossed him a scripture.

“I know you’re inexperienced with such things, so I won’t demand too much. Simply finish copying it.”

Song Jian held the thick book in his hands and laughed.

Hehe.

Bosses are all dog shit, dog shift!

Out loud, Song Jian said, “This subordinate obeys the decree.”

In his heart, he said: I hate you! Xiao Yinghuai! I hate you!

The man had already turned back to his scripture, the sharpness in his brows and eyes softened.

Song Jian opened the scripture.

What was all this writing?

He chewed on his fingernail while trying to figure it out. After dawdling for ages, he was still stuck on the first page.

After reading for a while, he lowered his head, rested both arms on the table, and poked at the text one character at a time with his index finger.

The feeling… was no different from being illiterate.

Not long afterward, the man’s calm voice sounded above his head again.

“Don’t sit there daydreaming. If you don’t finish copying it, there will be no meal for you.”

Song Jian: “!!!”

Aaaahhh!!

Damn it!!!

Song Jian hurriedly looked at two more characters.

Sob sob, I can’t understand it T_T

Someone save me!!

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  “007” is a Chinese internet slang term referring to an extreme work schedule of 12:00 a.m. to 12:00 a.m., seven days a week—essentially working around the clock with no days off.