TTLJDFL Chapter 5

Li Jin’s words gave Qin Muwen the feeling that he must be dreaming. He wondered if had he actually died, and his memories were now getting scrambled?

Ever since his family had been raided by the authorities, Qin Muwen had gone from being a Minister’s son to a prisoner.

Because of his status as a ge’er, he’d been spared from being exiled to Ningguta alongside his brothers, and spared from being sold into a brothel like his sisters.

At the time, Qin Muwen had been terrified, he was going to be sold off directly by human traffickers.

And to prevent any chance of his father’s former students rescuing him, those responsible had simply announced that he’d died, then quietly shipped him off to some remote mountain village and sold him there.

As for Li Jin, he stood about five foot ten, which made him tall even among a crowd of “seven-chi men” in this era (a chi back then was roughly 24 centimeters, so seven chi worked out to about five foot seven).

Naturally, the taller and more handsome a man was, the more popular he’d be with women. Li Jin wasn’t bad-looking at all, had regular features, a high nose bridge, and a pair of almond-shaped eyes that seemed to carry a hint of warmth whenever he looked at someone.

Qin Muwen had never given much thought to what his other half might be like.

But the first time he laid eyes on Li Jin, he hadn’t been disappointed.

Of course, if Li Jin had truly been that decent a person, those people probably wouldn’t have sold Qin Muwen off so callously in the first place.

As the son of a disgraced official, why would he ever be allowed to live comfortably?

After the marriage, Li Jin’s true nature came out. The man had no real ability to speak of, yet thought far too highly of himself, all talk and no substance, quick to look down on others.

Not to mention that the meager education Li Jin had picked up in town probably didn’t even match what Qin Muwen, a mere ge’er, already knew.

Even so, Li Jin still resented Qin Muwen for being a ge’er and embarrassing him.

Li Jin had set his sights on the top courtesan at the town’s Piaoxiang Pavilion, but with no money of his own, he naturally couldn’t win her favor.

After getting drunk, he’d come home and beat Qin Muwen. At first, Qin Muwen had still held out some hope for Li Jin, but eventually he simply resigned himself to enduring it, giving up on expecting anything better.

He’d always had a gentle, docile temperament to begin with, raised from childhood to be considerate toward his husband and never make excessive demands.

Even as a child of the Minister’s household, being a ge’er meant he was never destined to become anyone’s principal wife.

Qin Muwen’s own father had been the Minister’s concubine, it was precisely because of his docility that the Minister’s principal wife had allowed him to bear the Minister’s child.

As for Qin Muwen, it had taken over a year of marriage before he finally conceived.

Now, in the second year of their marriage, after ten months of pregnancy, the baby was finally due.

For a ge’er, giving birth was already a death sentence by nature. Qin Muwen had tried his absolute hardest, yet he was still nearly at his breaking point…

He didn’t want to die, death meant losing everything. At least, as long as he lived, there was still hope, still the blue sky and white clouds to see.

So no matter how hard things got, Qin Muwen had gritted his teeth and held on. But now, the situation had gone beyond what gritting his teeth could fix.

Li Jin’s hand, gripped tightly by Qin Muwen, no longer felt like his own. Ge’er didn’t normally have much strength, but one thrashing in agony could easily wrench pain into Li Jin’s frail, out-of-shape body in an instant.

Li Jin thought that whatever pain he was feeling now was a thousand, ten thousand times less than what Qin Muwen was enduring.

Being able to share in this youth’s suffering felt like some small atonement for what the original owner had done.

“Don’t just push blindly,” Li Jin said. “You need rhythm, or the baby will have a hard time coming out.”

Qin Muwen had just been through a wave of pain, tears welling involuntarily at the corners of his eyes from it.

Hearing Li Jin’s words, he couldn’t quite process them right away. But Li Jin, understanding the state he was in, didn’t waste time explaining further, he simply began giving instructions.

“Breathe in. Relax. Breathe out. Hold it, don’t scream—push.”

Li Jin’s pace was unhurried, his tone remarkably steady, nothing like how he usually spoke.

Qin Muwen pushed along with his guidance for less than ten minutes before suddenly gripping Li Jin’s hand with all his might.

A groan tore from his throat pain so intense it strangled the scream before it could fully form.

Being tall, Li Jin could see, the baby’s head slowly beginning to emerge.

The tension in Li Jin eased, and he said with relief, “The head’s almost out. Push a little more, and it’ll be over .”

This was no time to rest, one final push, and the baby would be born. About ten more minutes passed before the baby’s head fully emerged.

Li Jin supported Qin Muwen’s back and propped a pillow behind him, then went to wash his hands before carefully lifting the baby out. Once the head was out, all that remained was managing the shoulders, an obstetrician could easily bring the baby the rest of the way without the mother having to endure any further suffering.

Li Jin then took the scissors he’d prepared earlier, sterilized them over the kerosene lamp, and cut the umbilical cord.

The baby’s clear cry rang out, reaching both their ears. Thanks to Li Jin, Qin Muwen hadn’t suffered nearly as much as he might have during the birth, and he still had some energy left.

Li Jin cupped the baby with one hand under its bottom and expertly placed it into Qin Muwen’s arms, saying with a smile, “This one takes after you, so pretty.”

Qin Muwen had fair skin and delicate features, already striking to look at, and with that small cinnabar mole at the corner of his brow, there was something almost luminous about him.

Combined with his gentle temperament, he was exactly the kind of person men found impossible to resist.

Having finally given birth, the greatest weight on Qin Muwen’s heart lifted. Listening to the baby’s cries, his heart went soft, and he wanted nothing more than to give the child everything he had.

Qin Muwen turned his head to study the baby closely, though his angle limited what he could see. He noticed that even though Li Jin seemed different now from before, his words still didn’t quite add up….

This tiny baby, skin flushed red all over, eyes squeezed shut from crying, how did that resemble him at all?

And besides, wasn’t a father supposed to want his child to look like himself?

Why hadn’t Li Jin said the baby looked like him instead?

Qin Muwen did think the baby’s nose looked rather like Li Jin’s, though.
Gazing at the baby, Qin Muwen gradually tuned out everything else around him.

Li Jin gently massaged his belly to help the placenta detach naturally, then placed his hand on Qin Muwen’s abdomen to feel the firm post-partum uterus.

At this stage, someone needed to knead the uterus through the skin to help it gradually soften and shrink back to its original position, aiding the youth’s recovery.

But that wasn’t urgent right now. Li Jin looked at the soiled bedding beneath the youth and considered how to clean things up.

He first gathered up the scissors, the placenta, and other items. Then he wandered around the room and found a few of the original Li Jin’s outer garments, which he put on.

But he couldn’t find any spare bedding…

“So…” Li Jin said, “is there any more bedding in the house?”

He still didn’t even know the youth’s name.

At this point the youth came back to himself, only now noticing he was lying on a cushioned mat rather than the bare wooden plank bed. Reading the youth’s expression, Li Jin already knew the answer was no.

Slow as the youth might be to notice things, he could feel the dampness beneath him now…

Even though that was simply an unavoidable part of childbirth, he still felt deeply embarrassed.

He tried to shift slightly and immediately felt how sore his back was, how much his lower body ached, though compared to the pain of labor, this was nothing at all.

“Don’t move,” Li Jin said. “Just lie still, I’ll figure something out.”

Reluctantly, Li Jin went over to Li Daniu’s house, after all, glancing around from the village entrance, Li Daniu’s house and the village head’s house were clearly the grandest in the whole village.

As it happened, Li Daniu had just come back from working the fields. Seeing Li Jin, he asked, “Baby’s born?”

Li Jin nodded. “Born.”

Li Daniu: “Then why aren’t you home with your spouse instead of standing at my door?”

Li Jin: “I wanted to borrow a few things…”

Li Daniu: Had this man never been beaten before? Did he really look like such an easy pushover???

Li Jin said, “I’m short two mattresses and a quilt at home, and it’d help to have some diapers and swaddling cloth for the baby too. Whatever I take, I’ll pay you back in copper coins at market price. And while I’m paying you back, as interest, you can call on me anytime you want a game of chess, I’ll help you work through any moves you’re stuck on.”

Li Daniu had initially thought to himself that Li Jin was the type to borrow and never pay back. But that offer of “interest” at the end really caught his interest.

“Play a round with me first,” he said. “I need to see your skill.”

Li Jin held firm: “My spouse and the baby are waiting for me at home. I don’t have time right now. One answer, are you lending it or not?”

Having Li Jin on call for chess anytime was genuinely valuable interest. Li Daniu relented: “…Fine, fine, fine. Come on in and get it. I’ve actually got some freshly sewn bedding at home, my wife made it to sell in town, but I’ll sell it to you now instead, saves me the trouble of hauling it there by ox cart.”

So Li Jin carried his haul back home.

Sure enough, the well-off households in the village really did have money to throw around.

Qin Muwen still couldn’t move, and now Li Jin had gone out again. Alone, he grew anxious. If Li Jin hadn’t just been so gentle with him, he wouldn’t have cared at all where the man went.

But how could someone be so tender with him one moment, then just leave without a word the next?

Was Li Jin off drinking again? Was he really unable to keep this man home even after giving birth to his child?

Through the entire agony of labor, Qin Muwen hadn’t cried except for the involuntary tears of physical pain. But now, over this one small thing Li Jin had done, he couldn’t stop crying at all.

The baby, who’d finally worn himself out from crying and settled quietly beside his father, somehow sensed his father’s tears and began wailing right along with him.

When Li Jin returned and stepped into the courtyard, he heard the crying right away.

He thought to himself: this kid really is a handful, can’t even let the youth rest properly after all that exhausting labor. Not the least bit considerate toward his own father.

Qin Muwen struggled to sit up, still sticky underneath despite Li Jin having wiped him down earlier, the mat was still damp. Lying there wasn’t comfortable, and combined with the growing dread that Li Jin might not want him after all, he didn’t know what to do with himself…

It was only because Qin Muwen sat up that he got a full view of the baby for the first time. And in that instant, fresh grief welled up in him.

Why! why did his baby also have that same small cinnabar mole between his brows?